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this post was submitted on 15 Aug 2023
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Renegotiating consent when spaced and horny.
We planned and negotiated for a session, strictly no genital involvement agreed. When shit got intense, hot and heavy, they were very very angry with me not penising them.
Good discussions on informed enthusiastic consent were had.
Penising someone is now my new favorite euphemism for sex.
A euphemism usually is less explicit
Yep, been there. I go to her place, first time we ever met. Within a few minutes she makes me promise I will not be penising her. I agree because I'm only a part time dbag, not 100% a dick.
The night gets interesting, we both drink way more than we should on a first meet, lots of handsy action and everything but the agreed upon limits of consent.
"Why won't you?"
"You made me promise I wouldn't."
"Please?"
"No, but I'll do anything else you'd like."
"Whhhhyyyyyy"
This went on for hours. Never saw her again because she was apparently so upset I kept my promise, she didn't want to see me again. It's a weird sometimes-regret where I know I did exactly what I should have done, but had I not we both would have had more fun and maybe have had a repeat encounter.
Regarding your regret, I know it's not much, but this internet stranger is proud of you for sticking to your promise.
Thanks, truly appreciate that. I know it can be difficult in the heat of the moment to stick to a promise like that, and I could easily have had a moment of weakness.
Bro, you are a man of your word. That shit is fucking rare these days.
You: Sorry, Sir. As per our contract dated 14th August, 2023, paragraph 3, section 2 (b) and I quote "...no Penising, not even the tip, shall be allowed after 19.99 minutes of vigorous sex acts". The time is now 19.995 minutes. I must advise you of the penalty clauses as listed in the Appendices I, II and IV should you persist in breaking our prior agreement. Good day, Sir!
I had a parallel experience, renegotiating consent using their dominant position to define boundaries.
Nope nope nope, not how this is supposed to work.