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this post was submitted on 29 Sep 2023
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I think a lot of focus goes to the addict’s experience and how that experience impacts their life. If you limit the impact scope to the user and the consequences they face, it seems reasonable to suggest that easier access to safer substances can improve their circumstances.
What I experienced was a prolonged period of time where my wife lied, cheated, stole and shirked all responsibility for herself and our live’s together. Most critically, her substance abuse led to her neglecting and putting our young children at risk.
For my part, I did everything I could to help her recover. I encouraged her to get help without judgement. I found ways to balance taking care of the kids, taking care of her and myself, maintaining our home all while struggling to meet work expectations and fulfill my sole provider role.
Ultimately meth use led to paranoid delusions, intense fear and anger outbursts, belief in fantastical persecution conspiracy and finally distrust in me and her family. Still, I was trying to balance it all and encourage her to seek help. Instead of doing so she became violent threatened to put a knife in my throat and kill me while our children played in the other room.
We can argue about the war on drugs, the systemic failures to address mental illness and the lack of easily accessible care for people suffering addiction. But a person is still accountable for their behavior and when a substance causes them to completely lose themselves to the degree my wife did, I can’t help but feel frustration of anything that enables access to it.