125
Right-Wingers Say Super Bowl Is Rigged So Taylor Swift Can Endorse Biden
(www.rollingstone.com)
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
view the rest of the comments
this post was submitted on 29 Jan 2024
125 points (95.6% liked)
Not The Onion
12534 readers
1311 users here now
Welcome
We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!
The Rules
Posts must be:
- Links to news stories from...
- ...credible sources, with...
- ...their original headlines, that...
- ...would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”
Comments must abide by the server rules for Lemmy.world and generally abstain from trollish, bigoted, or otherwise disruptive behavior that makes this community less fun for everyone.
And that’s basically it!
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
I don't get it.
Why would the cabal, the super influential group secretly controlling all our actions, need a football team to win the superbowl to defeat them, and why would they, in all their Machiavellian wisdom, not have considered the 50% chance event that their football team loses?
Why would they pick Biden for another term then start WW3? Why not just start it now if that's what they want and he's already their puppet? They've had 3 years and there's certainly enough political tinder in the world to start a fire.
None of this makes any coherent sense.
You know what, I've thought about this some more and the reasoning is clear.
If the 49ers win, they'll inadvertantly resurrect Harvey Milk, who will kill JFK (who faked his own death and has been lying in wait), who will then be unable to reclaim the last months of his presidency (his term was never officially ended you know) which he planned to use to restore Donald Trump to power. Harvey Milk will then become president and make heterosexuality illegal and force us to live in 15 minute neighborhoods.
That must be their angle! They win either way!
There’s one key piece you’re missing, Joe Montana is actually resurrected Harvey Milk & has been this whole time.
This plan began back when Joe was winning Super Bowls, but Steve Young was an unexpected hiccup. The queer stopped spreading as fast when Joe got traded.
This Superbowl has been chosen specifically because Montana played for both the Chiefs & the 49ers, & because Joe Montana is also Taylor Swift.
They were going to do it 4 years ago, but Joe was still Arianna Grande back then.
It’ll all make sense when Andy Reid eats Travis Kelce during halftime.
Excuse my ignorance, but is there something going around about 15-minute neighborhoods? Someone pretty kooky mentioned something about that to me just today (in relation to Chattanooga, I think, but I didn't exactly follow the crazy train of thought). Something about how they're monitoring everyone and they can't take more than 100 trips outside that zone or something. I know it's all nonsense but there's also usually some tie back into reality.
I found this USA Today https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/factcheck/2023/04/10/fact-check-false-claim-15-minute-cities-lock-down-residents/11593351002/
From a snippet:
"The 15-minute city is the opposite of lockdown," Moreno said. "The 15-minute city is an open and connected city, which balances the differences in access to services."
The framework does not limit residents' ability to leave their neighborhoods or access services in other areas of the city.
“All citizens are free to go where they want," Moreno said. "There are no constraints.”
Thank you for this! I figured it was the usual mix of 1) a term based in reality, 2) a dash of sci-fi / dystopian tale, and 3) a whole ton of crazy.
The abilities of some to twist and misconstrue almost everything is almost impressive. Anytime anything might be helpful to society, they come up with conspiracies and ways it must be for evil.
I don't have, and never planned on having, any kids but, I always vote for and push for education. It is scary what large numbers of ignorant people can accomplish.
$0.02:
Optimistically: they're just crazy. Some have access to a louder bullhorn than others, but it's just garden variety insanity.
Pessimistically: someone has a huge pile of cash riding on the outcome of the game, and is making a Hail Mary pass of their own to sway the outcome.
It's because so much conspiracy theory requires the conspirators to be simultaneously all powerful but hilariously weak and stupid. And all their plans have to be announced and hinted at through pop culture and in ways that are suspiciously similar to popular movies and TV shows as remembered by people with no media literacy.
Brilliantly coded reference to Nicki Minaj (“it’s the butt have culture people“), “rapper” and illuminatiarian with 5G cheek implants controlling society via the minds of our youth. Didn’t expect to be so enlightened in this thread.
This is my response to all conspiracy theories. If this deep state cabal is so powerful, and has access to unlimited resources to achieve their agenda, wouldn't it be easier to just declare martial law and send the deep state army in to drag us all into the streets, point a gun at our heads and say comply or die? Why the theatrics? Is the deep state the Joker? Why not just shoot Batman in the head and be done with it?