Why would your best friend or someoneyou mutually considered a good friend suddenly ghost you? (lemmy.world)

submitted 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) by cheese_greater@lemmy.world to c/asklemmy@lemmy.world

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Is there a way to figure out if they blocked youon Signal if you can still technically message them?

~~Edit: he seems to have blocked me or hasn't used Signal since a single emphatically non-controversial/non-hurtful comment so he either blocked me or hasn't opened Signal for >month. He's not responding to anything else either so he's either depressed or blocked+done with me.~~

Edit: I'll know when it comes birthday time. I'm not a Bridezilla about birthdays but it would be unusual for him to not wish me one. He's never not done so. I'll have my answer when that happens 🙏 (namaste) If he wants to be a dick about it and leave me in the dark totally those days are fortunatley numbered :/

Edit: we're white and very (North)-American.

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[-] shinigamiookamiryuu@lemm.ee 4 points 8 months ago

Have you tried getting a second friend to see if they can contact them?

[-] cheese_greater@lemmy.world 3 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

Ya, I just gotta let it be for a while. If they were mine they'll come back to me, if they dont, they were never mine to begin with 😭

I refuse to give them that satisfaction if thats the case. I dont chase people who make it difficult to chase them

[-] shinigamiookamiryuu@lemm.ee 2 points 8 months ago

We always come back to each other though.

[-] cheese_greater@lemmy.world 2 points 8 months ago

Thats chicks but we're male. Not sure if that changes the calculus

[-] shinigamiookamiryuu@lemm.ee 2 points 8 months ago

I'm female tho

[-] cheese_greater@lemmy.world 2 points 8 months ago

So when I said thats chicks, that implied my understanding that the two of you were women.

I'm saying I believe as males its different

[-] shinigamiookamiryuu@lemm.ee 2 points 8 months ago

Oh. Sorry, read that wrong.

[-] fuckwit_mcbumcrumble@lemmy.world 2 points 8 months ago

Not really any different for men.

[-] cheese_greater@lemmy.world 1 points 8 months ago

I think guys can have more pride + shame involved. Thats absolutley a defect of our gender. I dont want to get into sexist stereotypes but its often different as males

[-] fuckwit_mcbumcrumble@lemmy.world 2 points 8 months ago

I think you're reading into things a bit too much.

Friends come and go with time, even close ones. You may not talk to someone for months, then randomly one day out of the blue you connect with them again like nothing ever happened. There's no ego involved in temporarily "losing" a friend, only to reconnect later.

[-] cheese_greater@lemmy.world 2 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

There is cuz if I'm correct he literally couldn't be bro enough to let me know he didnt want to talk to me anymore and let me waste time reaching out when it was hopeless. I don't believe in shadow-banning people, I believe in having a pair and using your words.

Also i felt like we were bffs for life (i know how childish that sounds) but i felt like we would always count on each other. I have another friend now like that so maybe its for the best. She'll be there for me and I'm glad he's sort of silently confessed what we mean to each other if it turns out there's not actually a good reason for it. I respect myself more that and I'm okay paying a theoretical price for that

He's turning out to be that Californian stereotype applied to friends: sunny and friendly and laughs till they turn or think little of you behind their backs but refuse to be explicit about their contempt

this post was submitted on 04 Mar 2024

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