For those out of the loop:
Global Tetrahedron is a fake evil corporation the Onion used as a bad guy in some stories.
Global Tetrahedron is also the real company that bought the Onion earlier this year.
Global Tetrahedron the real company also really bought InfoWars in a bankruptcy auction.
Global Tetrahedron the fake evil corporation is who wrote this article.

I was very amused seeing something cross-posted in both "Not the Onion" and "The Onion" at the same time and side by side in my feed.

They are a true unicorn, capable of simultaneously inspiring public support for billionaires and stoking outrage at an inept federal state that can assassinate JFK but can’t even put a man on the Moon.

Lmfao

Just when the country needed a laugh the most, The Onion went and did the funniest thing they could possibly do. This is a wonderful morning.

This is beautiful.

“a single candy bar–sized omnivitamin”. 😂

My favorite part is how they plan on spending the extra money. Really need to help those at-risk dictatorships!

Cheers, to the continued consolidation of power and capital!

Infinite Growth Forever,

🥂

Is this for real?