this post was submitted on 09 Jun 2025
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Lemmy Shitpost

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Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

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[–] daw@feddit.org 10 points 1 day ago
[–] shininghero@pawb.social 50 points 2 days ago (3 children)

Oh nooo, I'll have pass time by...
Read the ingredients on the shampoo bottle!

THE HORROR!!! THE SODIUM LAURETH SULFATE INFUSED HORROR!!!

[–] StarvingMartist@sh.itjust.works 20 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (1 children)

That's the old school phone, if you were lucky your mom bought some magazines and now you can read about how to best plant your herb garden before spring, it's fall btw

Reader's digest. My parents kept them in the bathroom.

[–] stupe@lemmy.zip 12 points 2 days ago (1 children)

That's why I keep a book by the toilet.

[–] Eyedust@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 1 day ago

I have one of the old Ripley's Believe It or Not books by mine. It's wild how many things in there that amazed people back in the day aren't really that amazing or unbelievable anymore. The internet has made the world a pretty jaded place.

[–] auraithx@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 2 days ago (2 children)

On average, it takes most mammals, including humans, about 12 seconds to have a bowel movement.

Why tf are you having to pass time?

[–] explodicle@sh.itjust.works 2 points 2 days ago

I guess I'm above average!

[–] xylol@leminal.space 3 points 2 days ago

To pass log

[–] Etterra@discuss.online 5 points 1 day ago
[–] lugal@sopuli.xyz 28 points 2 days ago

That's called "raw dogging". Am I using it right?

[–] nebulaone@lemmy.world 24 points 2 days ago (3 children)

It goes it goes it goes it goes it goes it goes it goes it goes

I miss them so much

[–] PaulBunyan@lemm.ee 4 points 2 days ago

Bought this LP for $30 in 2012. Greatest investment I’ve ever made.

[–] FMT99@lemmy.world 19 points 2 days ago

Nothing worse than being alone with your thoughts.

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 7 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Hope you got a bottle of Dr. Bronners in there.

[–] ZombiFrancis@sh.itjust.works 3 points 2 days ago

Moral ABCs never disappoint.

[–] neidu3@sh.itjust.works 6 points 2 days ago

Nothing is more haunting than the sound of introspection while pooping.

[–] Bishma@discuss.tchncs.de 7 points 2 days ago

I kind of miss the magazine that only gets read in the bathroom.

[–] kindenough@kbin.earth 6 points 2 days ago

Why? I am done in five seconds. Must be all the olive oil. Takes longer to wipe…

[–] some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org 3 points 2 days ago (1 children)

People who use their phone on the toilet are gross to me. I put in wireless earbuds and listen to a podcast. Preferably one without ads so I don’t have to touch them until after I’ve washed my hands.

[–] Dicska@lemmy.world 2 points 2 days ago

Non-dominant hand has entered the game.

[–] morgunkorn@discuss.tchncs.de 5 points 2 days ago

back in my days, i read the label at the back of the shampoo bottle or the descaling cleaning spray

[–] ColeSloth@discuss.tchncs.de 3 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Plan b: Can you still reach the bottle of shampoo?

[–] fungalfelidae5@lemm.ee 2 points 2 days ago

i love reading random shampoo bottles

[–] kruhmaster@sh.itjust.works 4 points 2 days ago

Bathroom Reader made a fortune off of this idea.

[–] shneancy@lemmy.world 3 points 2 days ago

that's why i keep two books in the bathroom. True Facts That Sound Like Bullshit by Shane Carley, and Brief Answers to Big Questions by Stephen Hawking. Perfect for reading ~10-20min at a time

[–] cRazi_man@europe.pub 2 points 2 days ago (1 children)

It's even worse when I go in prepared. I have young kids who will barge in and take my device while I'm on the throne. Now I've got to start taking in 2 devices so I still have something after losing one.

[–] Wizard_Pope@lemmy.world 2 points 2 days ago (2 children)
[–] cRazi_man@europe.pub 2 points 2 days ago (2 children)

Bathrooms have privacy locks, not security locks. They can be opened from the outside if someone tries, and my kids have little fingers that can open the latch from outside without any additional equipment.

[–] Honytawk@lemmy.zip 4 points 2 days ago

Then add a security lock you can close from the inside.

Hang it at the top of the door so it can't be used by children.

Or just discipline your children to not barge into occupied bathrooms.

[–] Wizard_Pope@lemmy.world 1 points 2 days ago

You have that at home? We just have a normal door with a normal lock.

[–] fibojoly@sh.itjust.works 1 points 2 days ago

The pure luxury!

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