this post was submitted on 19 Jun 2025
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Lemmy Shitpost

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top 31 comments
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[–] FeelzGoodMan420@eviltoast.org 73 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (2 children)

I wouldn't wear it but I see nothing wrong with it. It's funny....I don't think it's dumb unless you like wear it to a job interview or something. Ya'll need to lighten the fuck up.

Its a little tacky with the redneck speak, but i have no problem with a version in my local dialect.

[–] dependencyinjection@discuss.tchncs.de 2 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I would say it depends where you’re going. If you’re going to the pub with your mates have at it, kids party or shopping definitely not.

[–] TheFrirish@jlai.lu 2 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Lol the kids wouldn't get it anyway lol

Seems you were never a kid or you might have been sheltered lol

[–] surewhynotlem@lemmy.world 66 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Feminism out of control. Women don't enjoy sex. That's a myth. If female orgasms existed my wife would have had one by the third of the five pumps I give her.

[–] Ceedoestrees@lemmy.world 23 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Generous man, with two extra pumps. I dated a Mormon and got no pumps until I swapped his anti-seizure meds with caffeine pills.

[–] surewhynotlem@lemmy.world 21 points 1 week ago (3 children)

That's dark. It reminds me of a story.

A little old lady goes for a stroll in the park, when she sees a man sitting on a bench wearing a trench coat. As she walks closer, she realises he isn’t wearing anything else. She sits next to him and after a minute, he turns to her and asks, “Would you like to touch my penis?”

“Oh, no, I couldn’t,” she says. “I’m a widow and I haven’t touched one in years.”

“Go on,” he says. “It’s like riding a bike. You don’t forget.”

So she does. And every day for the next few months, she goes to the park and enjoys her encounter with the man.

One day, he isn’t at their regular meeting spot.

“Oh, well he was old,” she says to herself, thinking he’s died. But after a few minutes, she sees him on another bench with another little old woman.

“You bastard,” she says. “You’re cheating on me! What’s she got that I don’t?”

“Parkinson’s,” he replied.

Three little old ladies are sitting on a park bench when a flasher runs up.

Two of them have a stroke and the third couldn’t reach.

[–] Dagwood222@lemm.ee 4 points 1 week ago

90 year old woman goes to the local brothel. She tells the madam that she wants to try something new, so she wants to try being a hooker for a night. Madam makes some phone calls, finds some customers who 'd be into it, and tells the woman to come back the next night.

The next day the lady arrives, and soon the first john shows up. They walk upstairs, spend an hour, and come back. The second customer is waiting, and so he and she go upstairs. After she comes back down, the third guy arrives, so it's back upstairs.

At the end of the night the madam asks if she wants to come back?

"Oh, no dear. the sex was fine but those damn stairs will kill me."

[–] Ceedoestrees@lemmy.world 3 points 1 week ago

First old lady sits down on the other side. "She's got two hands, don't she?"

[–] mojofrododojo@lemmy.world 43 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Would you be dumb enough to wear this shirt in public?

some anticlitoral hate speech right there. clitoralists should be free to celebrate their faith openly just like any other religion, get fucked for being mean. at least the thing they worship actually exists.

[–] Mickey7@lemmy.world 5 points 1 week ago (1 children)

For years I have been petitioning Congress for a national holiday to celebrate the clit. I specifically have asked it to be in one of the summer months. I envision large parades with everyone that has one proudly marching with their pussy and clit showing off

[–] mojofrododojo@lemmy.world 2 points 1 week ago

The posters and signs would be great

[–] originalucifer@moist.catsweat.com 35 points 1 week ago (1 children)

i cant defend the display, but i can respect the intent.

to each his own

[–] Mickey7@lemmy.world 4 points 1 week ago

Let any who don't cherish the clit toss the first stone

[–] scytale@lemmy.zip 24 points 1 week ago

!shirtsthatgohard@lemmy.world

[–] loomy@lemy.lol 21 points 1 week ago (2 children)

I had the great honor of giving this post its 69th upvote.

[–] FeelzGoodMan420@eviltoast.org 9 points 1 week ago

I'll 420 blaze to that brother.

I think we should make a rule that memes that my drunk uncle posts to facebook five minutes before he passes out isn't a shitpost.

[–] adhocfungus@midwest.social 11 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Is that the CLIT Commander!?

[–] snipon@feddit.dk 3 points 1 week ago
[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 3 points 1 week ago (3 children)

Hit as in "have sex" or as in "hit?" 😕

[–] FeelzGoodMan420@eviltoast.org 39 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Obviously "have sex." There really is no room for interpretation error with this one.

[–] lars@lemmy.sdf.org 1 points 1 week ago

Britney Spears’s lyricist having thought “hit me baby one more time” meant “have sex with me one more time”. This barely made sense till now.

[–] KoboldCoterie@pawb.social 2 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Pretty sure they were going for the former, but I also wouldn't put it past anyone who would actually wear this shirt in public to do the latter.

[–] superglue@lemmy.dbzer0.com 12 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (2 children)

Thats interesting because I feel the opposite. I feel like guys that hit their wives are also less likely to go down on them.

I honestly don't understand why guys dont like it. Its kinda fun so long as shes clean.

[–] Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de 4 points 1 week ago

guys don't like it because they're misogynists or gay, i struggle to see any other option

[–] answersplease77@lemmy.world 1 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

you can look him up there was a rapist who would lick his victims.. that was his memo

[–] Mickey7@lemmy.world 1 points 1 week ago

hit as in having sex