this post was submitted on 15 Aug 2025
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Lemmy Shitpost

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[–] Samsy@lemmy.ml 114 points 2 weeks ago

"we don't know... they just are." Could be a slogan for the whole meat industry.

[–] MrSulu@lemmy.ml 86 points 2 weeks ago (5 children)

Its from Viz magazine! One of the UKs funniest and most sarcastic publications of all time.

https://uk.pinterest.com/raadax/viz-adverts/

[–] DJDarren@sopuli.xyz 37 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

I adore Viz.

They once printed the finest letter ever penned.

Photo of 'PR Guru' Max Clifford, with the comment "If Max Clifford is so good at PR, how come everyone thinks he's a cunt?

Also, this advert for flat-roof pubs will never not make me hoot.

A Viz advert for council estate flat roof pubs, featuring such gold as "Whether it's a man in the gents asking if you want to buy a polar bear cub, or someone bleeding heavily from a head wound at the end of the bar, you're always guaranteed a welcome of sorts at a flat-roof pub!"

[–] Dyskolos@lemmy.zip 11 points 2 weeks ago

Ah thanks. It's indeed hilarious 😁

[–] Valmond@lemmy.world 5 points 2 weeks ago

Ha ha fantastic!

[–] rizzothesmall@sh.itjust.works 5 points 2 weeks ago

Haha! The Princess Diana and Jade Goody ping pong ornament is fucking amazing!

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[–] mercano@lemmy.world 49 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Made from vegetarian cows.

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[–] ur_ONLEY_freind@lemmy.zip 33 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

We had this in texas but it's illegal now.

I think it's illegal in six other states too.

Reasons stated: Protect the economics of the cattle industry and to protect public health

No more beyond steak tips in my pasta, For the good of public health and to support the sale of real cow meat that I already never buy...

[–] Lyrl@lemmy.dbzer0.com 43 points 2 weeks ago

Growing meat cells in a lab and selling them as food is illegal in the states you reference.

What Beyond does in processing plant material into something that resembles some meat products is still legal everywhere.

[–] the_crotch@sh.itjust.works 25 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

Plant based "meats" are legal in Texas. Lab grown meat is not. Beyond is safe.

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[–] NotASharkInAManSuit@lemmy.world 14 points 2 weeks ago

Jokes are illegal in Texas? I guess that tracks…

[–] ObviouslyNotBanana@piefed.world 29 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (2 children)

That's the most vegan beef I've seen

Disappointed there's no nut in it

[–] ignotum@lemmy.world 11 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

Just nut in it

Just put your nuts in it *

Just put nuts in it *

[–] D_C@sh.itjust.works 5 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (2 children)

Question:
If I 'nut' in it for you then will it still be 100% vegetarian beef? And would you still eat it?

[–] Valmond@lemmy.world 4 points 2 weeks ago

Depends if you're a vegetarian ofc

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[–] iveseenthat@reddthat.com 23 points 2 weeks ago (4 children)

Well... the patty is made of 100% vegan cow, therefore, vegan meat.

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[–] NotASharkInAManSuit@lemmy.world 19 points 1 week ago (1 children)

It’s a fucking joke, you idiots, how are so many of you this dense?

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[–] over_clox@lemmy.world 17 points 2 weeks ago (4 children)

Thank goodness it doesn't contain genuine feces, only vegan feces.

Right? Right? 🤔

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[–] dumbass@leminal.space 16 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

That's how you convert me.

[–] WhatGodIsMadeOf@feddit.org 15 points 2 weeks ago

Not me. I like my beef cake with nut.

[–] Simulation6@sopuli.xyz 16 points 2 weeks ago (4 children)

So, if the steer dies of old age, surrounded by loved ones, would the beef be vegan? Sounds like the only 'logic' that could work for the ad.

[–] 9blb@feddit.org 17 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

The ad is fake and supposed to be a joke.

As for your question: I'd put it on the same level as eating roadkill or your dog that passed away. You could technically consider it "vegan", as there is no exploitation or (additional) suffering involved, but it is at least weird as fuck and kind of moot, because the people eating meat wouldn't eat it in the first place.

If you go by the literal definition, it's not vegan because eating animals is not vegan, obviously.

[–] Allero@lemmy.today 7 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] Teppichbrand@feddit.org 6 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (2 children)

Lab meat is a distraction to keep consumers from changing their ways. Like hydrogen for Big Oil, they keep telling us that this technology will have a great impact ... in the future! Until then, we don't need to worry and just continue giving dirty money for a destructive product to an evil industry. All while alternatives in form of plant based meat / solar are getting better and cheaper by the minute.
Seriously, did you try plant meats in the past months? There is no need to wait for lab grown meat anymore. Just buy plant based alternatives and get used to a food that tastes mostly like the animal tissue you're accustomed to.

[–] Lyrl@lemmy.dbzer0.com 7 points 2 weeks ago

The cost is a big turn off for most people. At grocery stores near me, the Impossible and Beyond products are more than double the price of the meat products they are imitating. In part because livestock feed is hugely subsidized by the government.

If the plant-based meat alternatives could gain efficiency through scale and experience to lower the cost below animal meat, we would see way more people trying them and finding what dishes they work best in, which would feed back into scaled market demand. But I don't see that kind of explosive growth potential at current price levels.

[–] Allero@lemmy.today 5 points 2 weeks ago

Sure, this was not a political statement or anything. Only a mention that lab-grown meat can technically be seen as vegan.

Personally, I still have meat in my diet, but I do experiment with plant-based options like soy meat and seitan, and also play around with tofu and oat milk.

[–] Lumisal@lemmy.world 5 points 2 weeks ago

It could also be that the owner is named Crompton Veggie, and these are his Veggie burgers

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[–] Grass@sh.itjust.works 13 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

this is just dumb and I'm not even vegetarian or vegan. It reminds me of the kind of stuff this shitstain I went to school with would say, repeatedly and loudly to make sure as many people as possible heard him.

[–] ParadoxSeahorse@lemmy.world 6 points 2 weeks ago

It’s literally in shitpost…

[–] Lupus@feddit.org 5 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I like when people loudly broadcast that they are assholes, I tend to believe them and can steer clear of them :)

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[–] NotACentrifugalBird@infosec.pub 12 points 2 weeks ago

Abbatoir Rd is a nice touch.

[–] Tattorack@lemmy.world 10 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I mean... teeeeechnically beef is what a giant bovine turns plants into.

[–] TriflingToad@sh.itjust.works 19 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

my BODY is a MACHINE that turns GRASS into HAMBURGERS

*badass photo of a cow skeleton lifting weights*

[–] Ilovethebomb@sh.itjust.works 8 points 1 week ago

Good to see the users here are as good at recognising a joke as they've ever been.

[–] electric_nan@lemmy.ml 8 points 2 weeks ago

Alpha-Gal is coming for you...

[–] Redjard@lemmy.dbzer0.com 8 points 1 week ago (1 children)
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[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 7 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

"Made out of 100% real vegetarians" was the old joke

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[–] AnimalsDream@slrpnk.net 4 points 2 weeks ago (15 children)

About on par with usual omni mental gymnastics.

[–] 4grams@awful.systems 10 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I was really expecting them to lean into my stupid old joke. I’m a vegetarian once removed, I only eat animals that only eat plants.

Can’t even clear that low bar of creativity.

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