The fans revving for 20 seconds and the program opening it's loading screen: "Nice".

The fans revving for 5 seconds and the program is sitting at 0% CPU after 1 full minute: "fuck this bullshit." But you hold onto hope and wait another 5 minutes, and as your confirming to restart the PC the program starts loading, and you have to watch it load entirely before it's killed by the restart, and the restart takes even longer because the program actually opened.

Or,

You browser is loading homestarrunner.com and the loading bar stops at 10% like it should for 5 minutes, but the 5 minutes passes by, and you click the clock on the task bar only to see your mouse turn into an hourglass.

The brown ones cost more to raise due to their inherent behavior and lack of rooster figure.

Your wife, and don't call me dog.

I'm desperately trying to find a new phone that isn't a Samsung. I switched by force from LG to Samsung and even though the Samsung was 3 years newer, it was a downgrade.

It pushes so many notifications I have given up. I'm going to have to spend $1400 on a Sony just to retain my SD card slot and get rid of the bloatware.

Since starting my hunt, my garbage s20 is pushing so many s24 ads. Guess how many phones have an SD card slot and a FHD+ screen?

Nine. 4 of them are made by Sony.

Edit: I forgot to mention that my samsung phone also gave me a notification Ad for the S24. I didn't think to screenshot it because my notifications are so aggressive that I have become brain dead to this bullshit. I can clear a wall of 15 and within 3 minutes have another wall of 10.

That's my excuse in real life too.

I know this is just a joke, but having at least an "alpine" or "mountain" coaster down to the bottom could save many lives.

Unfortunately a corporation is a person. Worse yet is when they are a very rich person with actual product and capital.

Caption: "He did it!"

ManPointingtoLegalDocumentAknowledgingCreationofaCorporateEntity.jpg

We get it. You've done acid.

You might look even better in a burka.

Everyone's butt hole could be anywhere on their body. Everyone needs a different kind of toilet to properly position themselves. Everyone starts aligning themselves as friends based on the location of their butt hole. "Oh sorry I can't stay too long. My butthole is in my armpit."

I don't think I've heard anyone say that before. Almost everything they make is industry standard setting when it comes to price. It's either so cheap you can't believe it, or it's priced right where it should be.

He farts when you expect him to shit, and he shits when you expect him to fart. That's the fart of the deal.