I'm under the assumption it healed on it's own. The pain is gone and hasn't come back, although I haven't lifted nearly as intensely since. I have access to a nurse outside of a hospital so they helped me keep tabs on it, took something around 1.5 months to heal up though.

The dichotomy of how resilient or fragile our bodies are is wild. I like your analogy of various consistencies of jello.

Well on the bright side you found out about the hernia, hopefully before it was a serious issue and got it fixed.