this post was submitted on 15 Aug 2025
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The comments here seem a bit weird, I'm not sure why we're calling her a narcissist and immediately disbelieving the situation. I've met the partners of some of my friends over the years and been genuinely a bit surprised by how dismissive and rude some men can be.
Yes, it's sad that she's resorted to the yes-man-as-a-service subscription, but she even recognises that in the very first (non meta) sentence.
I'm sure we've all been in relationships wherein our partner doesn't make us feel heard or cared about, at least some of the time.
Wanting to feel understood and appreciated doesn't make us narcissistic. It makes us human beings wanting to belong.
It also tragically makes us vulnerable to these bastard chatbots who want to suckle at our wallets and our data.
If that's what she wanted, she should have picked a guy who delivers it.
If she can't find a guy like that, she better off staying single.
Good dudes are in short supply, that's the market. You want good shit, get out there and compete for it.
It works both ways obviously. If someone can't find a good mate, that's inherently a personal problem. They have to fix themselves first until they are able to get what they want.
Nobody is entitled to a partner, it is a privilege to have a good one.
She says "I don't feel like there's any connection between us anymore", which makes me think there was at some point. Presumably that'll be why they got married. I didn't say anybody was entitled to a partner, nor do I believe that.
Right before that she said she "settled"
That's already a bad way to start a marriage. Also, that's toxic behavior and unfair to the the partner.
I know you didn't say it but OP's chat gpt thing clearly seems like she feels entitled to it without doing much of any actual work.
Hence why this thread has comments that she is the problem
And judging from what is written in the post, and that she's implied the connection between them has gone, do you think her partner may have "settled" after getting married, too?
It's a widely told joke that spouses "settle" and "stop trying" after tying the knot. It just feels odd to me personally to jump to blaming her for picking a bad guy, and assuming she's not doing any work (she also describes the kind of work she is putting into the relationship in the post).
Knowing how men are... I don't dispute the behaviour she alleges.
However, I also dont buy she didn't know this before going into marriage. Hence my original thesis that she should have been choosing better.
I find it odd that a person can say she settled for a guy and two years later she lost connection and somehow this is the guys problem.
With respect of her showing love... Good for trying but it only matters if that's what he wanted.
Reading between the lines it sounds like they are doing things they think other person wants BC that'd what they want. That's a maturity issue and or age gap.
8 years is a lot of time esp in your 20s but women marry older then pika face when dude doesn't treat you as an equal partner.
I don't feel like we're getting anywhere here really but I can agree the age gap in your 20s is big! I'm always concerned I'm being prudish but decade plus age gaps when one partner is early twenties always rub me the wrong way lol. Have a good start to the weekend! โ๏ธ