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submitted 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) by Clinicallydepressedpoochie@lemmy.world to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml
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[-] boydster@sh.itjust.works 280 points 4 months ago

Strange women lying in ponds distributing swords as a basis for a system of government.

[-] MargotRobbie@lemm.ee 65 points 4 months ago

Strange woman here, anyone knows where I can buy swords in bulk, preferably with a pond thrown in? It's for... a personal project.

[-] dethedrus@lemmy.dbzer0.com 25 points 4 months ago

Are we to believe that famous actress Margot Robbie doesn't have some sort of connection for bulk medieval weaponry?

I am shocked and dismayed.

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[-] davel@lemmy.ml 178 points 4 months ago
[-] Hubi@feddit.org 46 points 4 months ago

That wasn't really a thing in medieval times. I'm afraid an axe will have to do.

[-] CulturedLout@lemmy.ca 30 points 4 months ago
[-] Tugboater203@lemmy.world 22 points 4 months ago

Of course! It's the superior siege engine.

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[-] Semi_Hemi_Demigod@lemmy.world 105 points 4 months ago

Having most of the year off for festivals and holy days

[-] Tar_alcaran@sh.itjust.works 35 points 4 months ago

Good news: take up subsistence farming, no healthcare, no electricity, and make everything yourself, and you too can have half the year "off".

[-] Semi_Hemi_Demigod@lemmy.world 54 points 4 months ago

Don't threaten me with a good time

[-] Tar_alcaran@sh.itjust.works 33 points 4 months ago

I mean the reality was that the time "off" was spent farming their own land, taking care of animals, fixing the house and doing the insane number of household tasks that come with premodern living. Spend a few days just cooking in a medieval style, and you'll quickly realize it's a LOT of work.

[-] pelespirit@sh.itjust.works 18 points 4 months ago

Meh,

  • They had horrible healthcare they couldn't afford and WE have horrible healthcare we can't afford
  • They spent a lot of time at festivals and with their communities helping each other and WE spend a lot of time chatting on our phones, but mostly playing games.
  • They spent a lot of time outdoors doing a lot of work but keeping active, and we can sometimes go for hikes or walks, but we're Americans, we as a whole, don't.
  • They knew how an could fix things around the farm, we can watch youtube videos unless it's electronic or DRM.
  • They had witch hunts and misinformation and WE have witch hunts and misinformation.
  • All of the food they grew was organic but they had to grow it themselves and we have to pay an arm and a leg for non-poisoned food.
  • They spent all day working for the king and we spend all day working for billionaires.
  • They have poor starving people during famines, we have a too big percentage of poor starving people (13% of US population was food insecure during 2023).
  • They had xenophobia and WE have xenophobia.
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[-] ArbitraryValue@sh.itjust.works 87 points 4 months ago

My non-joke answer is apprenticeship. Kids could actually learn how to do a valuable job rather than graduating from high school with almost no useful skills.

[-] DeltaTangoLima@reddrefuge.com 28 points 4 months ago

TIL that the US doesn't have apprenticeships. We have them over here in Australia, for the usual trades. But we also regulate a lot of those things - we're not allowed to handle our own electrical work if we're not trade qualified.

How does it work in the US, if a kid wants to become, say, a plumber?

[-] norimee@lemmy.world 24 points 4 months ago

Thats not medieval, thats everywhere exept the US of A.

Where I live, apprenticeships are officially regulated and for many proffessions you are not allowed to open a business without proper qualification.

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[-] Sam_Bass@lemmy.ml 86 points 4 months ago
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[-] UltraGiGaGigantic@lemm.ee 86 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

Our leaders fighting in the wars they start.

You wanted it... go fucking get it cowards.

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[-] nick@midwest.social 76 points 4 months ago
[-] captain_aggravated@sh.itjust.works 24 points 4 months ago

guillotines are renaissance era.

[-] draughtcyclist@lemmy.world 43 points 4 months ago

Giant shirtless executioners then, I guess.

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[-] Linkerbaan@lemmy.world 72 points 4 months ago
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[-] rtxn@lemmy.world 69 points 4 months ago
[-] ZILtoid1991@lemmy.world 67 points 4 months ago

Peasant uprisings, to take down the kings of today.

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[-] DLSantini@lemmy.ml 58 points 4 months ago
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[-] Toribor@corndog.social 56 points 4 months ago

Cloaks would be cool. I know that's more of a fantasy aesthetic than a medieval one but they are cool enough that it shouldn't matter.

[-] Leg@sh.itjust.works 27 points 4 months ago

I have a cloak vendor bookmarked. I haven't pulled the trigger because I don't know if I wanna be the cloak guy, but dammit I want a cloak.

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[-] PolandIsAStateOfMind@lemmy.ml 21 points 4 months ago

Medieval aesthetics also really had cloaks, but big detached hoods were more common.

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[-] explodicle@sh.itjust.works 46 points 4 months ago

Inns, especially if they've got an enormous pot of perpetual stew, and people are giving out quests.

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[-] MegaUltraChicken@lemmy.world 46 points 4 months ago

Catapults, just to irritate the trebuchet people.

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[-] paskalivichi@sh.itjust.works 45 points 4 months ago

Guillotines for kings

[-] venoft@lemmy.world 39 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

The stockade is something we desperately need. Some people need to learn how other people see them. Driving 50mph in a living area, stockade. Making a lot of noise at 6 in the morning, believe it or not, stockade. Being a racist cunt, straight to the stockade.

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[-] PostProcess@lemmy.world 36 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

Trebuchets - the superior siege engine. (Disclaimer: probably not medieval)

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[-] andrewta@lemmy.world 33 points 4 months ago
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[-] Etterra@lemmy.world 32 points 4 months ago

Dueling. I say we use it as an option to reply to a civil lawsuit. Able bodied adults only, no proxies, and if you refuse then you have to do a trial and they can weigh your refusal as evidence against you.

Swords only, no guns.

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[-] Phenomephrene@thebrainbin.org 31 points 4 months ago

Royalty and nobility taking part in actual on-the-ground warfare. I'd be curious if that would have any effect on military operations...

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[-] Sanctus@lemmy.world 27 points 4 months ago

Receiving land for farting good.

[-] xmunk@sh.itjust.works 27 points 4 months ago

Mandatory longbow training for yoemen and yoewomen. Let's get those skills trained up in case we're ever facing a charge of French knights.

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[-] xantoxis@lemmy.world 23 points 4 months ago

Fucking guillotines already

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[-] Clinicallydepressedpoochie@lemmy.world 22 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

Sorcery, alchemy, soothsaying, baby. Come one come all I'll cure what ails you. I'll summon portals and turn lead into #gold.

Or maybe the town crier. Hear ye, hear ye, elon musk hast tweeted about his balls.

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[-] RBWells@lemmy.world 21 points 4 months ago

I guess we could use a little ice age right around now, and it would also be nice to have a Renaissance around the corner.

Someone said inns and taverns, and yes it's a missing piece of housing here - long term hotels with food, bars/restaurants with rooms to rent above.

Not much though, it is not a time I'd visit.

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[-] roguetrick@lemmy.world 20 points 4 months ago

Weird ass slices in public parks everybody has to garden in. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Open-field_system

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[-] mlg@lemmy.world 20 points 4 months ago

Random pedestals with swords driven into them lol

[-] Arfman@aussie.zone 34 points 4 months ago

Maybe a system where strange women lying in ponds distributing swords might actually be better

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[-] CyberMonkey404@lemmy.ml 20 points 4 months ago

Kings, plagues, private armies (more late medieval and renaissance, but you get the idea), career military with hi-tech weapons tearing apart barely armed peasants. Idk, OP, seems like we got almost everything covered

[-] shinigamiookamiryuu@lemm.ee 18 points 4 months ago

Bathhouses. The local Quicklee's just doesn't do it.

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this post was submitted on 02 Jul 2024
379 points (94.2% liked)

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