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[-] Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world 147 points 2 months ago

Imagine being the guy at the novelty T-Shirt company, who takes requests.

And then THIS order comes in.....

[-] Klear@sh.itjust.works 35 points 2 months ago

They probably make these in bulk.

[-] Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world 38 points 2 months ago

..........I honestly don't know if that's better or worse.

[-] Godric@lemmy.world 21 points 2 months ago

That must be a day for thought, like what is going in in that man's head?

[-] BeigeAgenda@lemmy.ca 106 points 2 months ago

Imagine a world where people just wear their dating profile on the back and then someone who fancy them says "I'm down for that, where's your consent form?".

[-] Godric@lemmy.world 55 points 2 months ago

Incredibly based world, if it were so easy

[-] lud@lemm.ee 14 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Sounds like bureaucracy that has gone a bit too far, lol

I bet the Vogons would like it though.

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[-] billwashere@lemmy.world 83 points 2 months ago
[-] FenrirIII@lemmy.world 7 points 2 months ago

More like a warning

[-] Godric@lemmy.world 75 points 2 months ago

The longer you read it, the more bizzarely specific and funnier it gets

[-] takeda@lemmy.world 21 points 2 months ago

I wish I could read the whole thing.

[-] Iheartcheese@lemmy.world 12 points 2 months ago

I wish I could set him up on a blind date with a few people

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[-] corsicanguppy@lemmy.ca 9 points 2 months ago

the more [bizarrely] specific and funnier

Maybe that's the joke? Are we all just not getting the humour? I watched The Office and kinda felt the same as I do now; maybe it's more 'cringe' humour?

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[-] skozzii@lemmy.ca 69 points 2 months ago

How were they able to catch a picture of him before he got swarmed by 17 and 18 year old blondes.

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[-] Fuckfuckmyfuckingass@lemmy.world 66 points 2 months ago
[-] Godric@lemmy.world 17 points 2 months ago

Hilariously specific!

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[-] USSMojave@startrek.website 63 points 2 months ago

Someone needs to put this text into a Star Wars style opening crawl

[-] Mandy@sh.itjust.works 33 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

never ask me for anything ever again

https://starwarsintrogenerator.com/scroller?u=ysq7d7kg

(for some reason the text takes a while to come up, but it does eventually)

[-] chiliedogg@lemmy.world 13 points 2 months ago

Just realized you couldn't copy/paste for the prompt and had to type that out...

[-] Mandy@sh.itjust.works 14 points 2 months ago

i have taken psychic damage for each word i typed

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[-] Zozano@lemy.lol 57 points 2 months ago

Lawful evil

[-] thanks_shakey_snake@lemmy.ca 56 points 2 months ago

It's nice for him to be inclusive of 18! year olds. Dating can be difficult for ladies in their mid-quadrillions.

[-] taiyang@lemmy.world 52 points 2 months ago

It's like the intro text scroll to a Star Wars movie...

[-] massive_bereavement@fedia.io 38 points 2 months ago

IT'S A TIME OF STRIFE FOR THE REPUBLIC MEANWHILE IF YOU'RE A BLONDE OF 17 OR 18 YEARS OLD, WHICH IS..

[-] dwindling7373@feddit.it 49 points 2 months ago

Seeing this in the wild my first thought would be that he lost some kind of bet or has been challenged into wearing this in a crowded place.

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[-] baggachipz@sh.itjust.works 45 points 2 months ago
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[-] RacerX@lemm.ee 40 points 2 months ago

All of that text and he didn't specify what gender he's looking for.

[-] sneezycat@sopuli.xyz 53 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Technically, blondes implies women; if it was non-women it'd be blonds

[-] Cataphract@lemmy.ml 15 points 2 months ago

well shit, TIL

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[-] blackstampede@sh.itjust.works 38 points 2 months ago

The man has a type, and that type is either 17 or 6402373705728000 years old.

[-] Itdidnttrickledown@lemmy.world 36 points 2 months ago

There must be easier less public ways to declare yourself a permanent virgin.

[-] OpenStars@discuss.online 8 points 2 months ago

On the other hand, what better way for a parent to ensure that their precious little guy remains one? 😜

[-] zcd@lemmy.ca 30 points 2 months ago

Some shirts here honestly do not go that hard. But this shirt... this shirt goes fucking hard wow

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[-] Dasus@lemmy.world 29 points 2 months ago

In the future for this guy; getting shived in prison for being a pedo.

[-] superkret@feddit.org 41 points 2 months ago

But he's specifically looking for legal age girls.
Very. specifically.

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[-] Mango@lemmy.world 20 points 2 months ago

Jesus Christ. Dude has no self awareness or taste. Just technical demands for a subjective experience.

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[-] 2ugly2live@lemmy.world 17 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

I would not hang around that guy in that shirt. Hell, just knowing he owned that shirt would make me terminate a friendship. That's fucking insane.

[-] massive_bereavement@fedia.io 17 points 2 months ago

I'll rather do:

The Country Needs You!

If you're legally blonde,

apply here.

Service grants citizenship.

Note:" Brevity is the soul of advertisement"

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[-] nifty@lemmy.world 16 points 2 months ago

I want to be believe he lost a bet or dare. If not, I think this person would have more luck forgetting about dating and going super niche into a competitive hobby. Getting into a competitive hobby isn’t about getting laid, but about focusing your frustrations into something goal oriented and controllable. You cannot make someone like you, but you can become the god of your hobby kingdom. Maybe along the way they’ll learn social skills and graces which might help with getting laid.

Sometimes I think there should be a dating app specifically for awkward and less conventionally attractive people.

[-] Godric@lemmy.world 14 points 2 months ago

My bet is he lost a bet, it's so specific especially at the end

[-] crawancon@lemm.ee 13 points 2 months ago

"sir, this is a Wendy's"

or

"my son is also named Bort"

[-] lennivelkant@discuss.tchncs.de 13 points 2 months ago

Putting your physical description on your shirt 💀

[-] pyre@lemmy.world 12 points 2 months ago

c/libertarianshirts

[-] Mobiledecay@lemmy.world 10 points 2 months ago

Women if you want me you have to be hot and have big titties. I'm a youtuber so I obviously don't care about age. Just don't snitch or tell the police. I'm too pretty to go to prison and I also don't wanna get beat into submission or get killed while i'm there. Also don't bring bear spray on our first date or a gun. Please come unarmed. Trust me I won't hurt you. The last three violent crimes I committed were well deserved and I won't do it again. Bring a ballgag thank you have a good day. I want a cupcake goodbye. 🥰🧁

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[-] Steve@communick.news 10 points 2 months ago

This feels like we're making fun of someone with clear social disabilities.

I don't like it.

[-] Godric@lemmy.world 69 points 2 months ago

Yeah! Someone with a social disability decided to make their very very creepy and detailed preferences plain for the world to see in exhaustive, almost parodillic detail,

Or: It's a joke shirt

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[-] 5714@lemmy.dbzer0.com 24 points 2 months ago

"I want my first time to be with someone as young possible..."

[-] LikeTearsInTheRain@lemmynsfw.com 22 points 2 months ago

First time I saw this online people seemed pretty convinced the dude just lost a sports bet and this is the loser's prize.

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[-] NegativeLookBehind@lemmy.world 9 points 2 months ago

The pinnacle of chivalry

[-] Yawweee877h444@lemmy.world 8 points 2 months ago

This is just so ridiculous, it's hard for me to believe he actually believes or thinks this way. My assumption, and maybe I'm too optimistic here, is that he saw this and thought it was stupid funny and decided to buy/wear it to be immature funny/edgy...

I just can't fathom someone wearing this unironically. In which case, severe mental/cognitive issues?

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this post was submitted on 08 Oct 2024
444 points (93.5% liked)

Shirts That Go Hard

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