Computers were supposed to solve math, NOT to be programmed
C is a LETTER, not a language
Wanna print() something? Write it in a PAPER with a PEN
"I'm writing a recursive method with threads to optimize the CPU usage in a 0.02%" THIS IS A NONSENSICAL STATEMENT MADE BY DERANGED PEOPLE

Look at what PROGRAMMERs have been demanding your respect for, after all the led lights we put in their computers: (This is real COMPUTER SCIENCE, done by real COMPUTER SCIENTISTS)

FUNNY COLORED LETTERS (with a picture of syntax-highlighted code)
178 COMPILATION ERRORS????? (with a picture of compilation errors
A FAKE TEAPOT YOU CAN'T USE (with a picture of a 3d rendered teapot.

IF PROGRAMMING WAS REAL HOW COME NOBODY THOUGH IN DOING while(true{print(money);}

end transcript.

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[–] MonkderVierte@lemmy.ml 24 points 6 days ago (3 children)

Science? There's science behind the clusterfuck we call software nowadays?

[–] slaneesh_is_right@lemmy.org 14 points 6 days ago (1 children)

I think it's only getting worse. I always assumed the next generation will be more tech savvy than the last one. I had to learn windows/mac/dos when i grew up, just to play some video games. There was a lot of troubleshooting and hardware problems i had to figure out. When i was 25, people would tell me that their 5 year old can use their ipd better than they can. (Ipads just came out.) I thought these kids are gonna be computer wizards when they grow up. It was the absolute opposite. I talked to these kids when they were around 16 again, and they were absolutely clueless. If it wasn't an ipad or an app they could use, they might as well play with a piece of glass. Can you do ..... On an ipad? Hmm, what app is that? It's not an app is something you do, like a setting. Hmmm... I'll check the app store.

[–] CanadaPlus@lemmy.sdf.org 7 points 6 days ago

Yep, 1990-2010 was kind of the golden age for learning computers on the fly. They were too rare and inaccessible before, and they're too polished and sandboxed now.

[–] Irelephant@lemm.ee 6 points 6 days ago (1 children)

Vaguely.

[–] Comment105@lemm.ee 5 points 6 days ago (1 children)

Misinterpreted, abused, generally mistreated, ignored and disrespected.

[–] SatouKazuma@programming.dev 1 points 4 days ago

I feel like these terms apply to any non-JS dev ever.

Source: JS can suck my balls. It's an awful, chaotically evil language that has never made any sense, nor do I think it ever will.

[–] CanadaPlus@lemmy.sdf.org 3 points 6 days ago

Yes, it's just buried under crap and and redundant copies of itself. And possibly still written in Fortran.

[–] humanspiral@lemmy.ca 33 points 6 days ago (1 children)

while 1 print money

Central banks obfuscate this code a bit, but its all about having the right printer hooked up.

[–] CanadaPlus@lemmy.sdf.org 3 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago)

Well, they use a for loop that whatever group of bureaucrats has to enter a limit into, but basically yes.

[–] morrowind@lemmy.ml 31 points 6 days ago (3 children)

Ok but that is actually a nonsensical statement. In no case will using threads and recursion reduce cpu usage

[–] masterspace@lemmy.ca 14 points 6 days ago

Oh I can use threads and recursion to stop CPU usage.

[–] limer@lemmy.dbzer0.com 9 points 6 days ago (1 children)

Maybe if the threads pause a lot, and pause even more as the stack unwinds to the final exciting conclusion.

[–] morrowind@lemmy.ml 6 points 6 days ago

I suppose that's true. And also deranged to do it on purpose

[–] Amir@lemmy.ml 1 points 5 days ago

Removing spinlocks on IO by using async event handling can reduce cpu usage

[–] onlyhalfminotaur@lemmy.world 13 points 6 days ago

Where is "they've played us for absolute fools"

[–] sp3tr4l@lemmy.zip 23 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago) (1 children)

I mean, the entirety of Steam's code could maybe be described as an obfuscated version of

while(true){ print(money); }

[–] Irelephant@lemm.ee 15 points 6 days ago (2 children)

Twitter is just a wrapper around a database.

[–] sp3tr4l@lemmy.zip 5 points 6 days ago

[–] Comment105@lemm.ee 3 points 6 days ago

YouTube is just a weeeeeeeird cylinder that simply can not be filled.

[–] _____@lemm.ee 12 points 1 week ago (1 children)

using threads to reduce cpu usage ? in what world ? if you can parallelize tasks you will always increase the workload done.

[–] sus@programming.dev 18 points 6 days ago

they said optimize CPU usage, not reduce CPU usage. clearly they actually want to increase CPU utilization in this mysterious "0.02%" situation in order to get the results faster

[–] x00z@lemmy.world 6 points 6 days ago (1 children)

Ah yes, let's forget that that image is created on a computer

[–] Irelephant@lemm.ee 9 points 6 days ago (1 children)

No, I made it pixel by pixel on a piece of paper, and then scanned it to spread the word.

[–] Zzyzx@lemmy.blahaj.zone 6 points 6 days ago

Thank you for your service

[–] wheeldawg@sh.itjust.works 3 points 5 days ago

What is "a 0.02%"?

[–] Sam_Bass@lemmy.world 3 points 5 days ago

So saith corporal Ludd

[–] FundMECFSResearch@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 6 days ago

Appreciate the alt text

[–] Mothproof2212@feddit.org 70 points 1 week ago (3 children)

Why are you trying to write python? Just get one from the pet shop!

[–] davidgro@lemmy.world 33 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Rust is even easier, you probably have some you aren't even using. Check in the bikeshed.

[–] LinyosT@sopuli.xyz 10 points 6 days ago

Why are you writing Rust? Do you want to get tetanus?

[–] jef@lemm.ee 5 points 6 days ago

Don't understand why it takes people so long anyways, took me like 5 seconds to write it.

[–] robocall@lemmy.world 1 points 5 days ago

I get my Java from a local coffee shop

[–] SlopppyEngineer@lemmy.world 51 points 1 week ago (1 children)

A client with s very low budget wanted a solution for their filing. We suggested they could get more bang for their bucks with preprinted paper forms, pens and a cabinet than going for software. They were not amused.

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[–] nullPointer@programming.dev 42 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (2 children)

I just tell people that I am a "professional button pusher"

[–] Irelephant@lemm.ee 33 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Knowing which buttons to push is the valuable part though.

[–] ulterno@programming.dev 21 points 1 week ago

That's what diffs a professional button pusher from an amateur button pusher.
When you know which buttons in which order get you money, you become a professional.

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