this post was submitted on 30 Aug 2025
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Based on a true story.

[Alt-text]A brain asks a woman in bed, "Hey you goin' to sleep?". The woman responds, "Yes, now shut up". The brain says, "The internet is speculating that Trump died." The woman has a dead eye stare and is not going to sleep in a timely fashion.

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[–] peaceful_world_view@lemmy.world 138 points 3 weeks ago (5 children)

I feel like I'll know when he's dead.....like the air will somehow be easier to breathe.

[–] Valmond@lemmy.world 43 points 3 weeks ago

Less cheeto dust in the wind...

[–] CileTheSane@lemmy.ca 14 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

The air will be filled with cheering and celebration

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[–] lath@piefed.social 103 points 3 weeks ago (4 children)

Vance said 'I'm ready to be president, just in case' and some people were like 'oh shit, it's happening!'.

[–] PotatoesFall@discuss.tchncs.de 70 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

People were starting to talk about Trumps politics again instead of the Epstein files so they planted a new distraction.

It's so obvious and yet we keep falling for it.

[–] FaceDeer@fedia.io 25 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

I don't think they would deliberately use a distraction that paints Trump as being weak.

[–] LodeMike@lemmy.today 11 points 3 weeks ago
[–] birdwing@lemmy.blahaj.zone 8 points 3 weeks ago

Release the Epstein Files, Pedo Trump

[–] garbagebagel@lemmy.world 17 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

Yeah but do we really think Vance has the, idk what you'd call it, moron-charm? Charm that attracts only morons? Whatever it is that Trump offers?

[–] Pat_Riot@lemmy.today 11 points 3 weeks ago

He doesn't. Vance has all the personality and presence of cold oatmeal.

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[–] vivalapivo@lemmy.today 86 points 3 weeks ago (6 children)

Hey Americans, this is a feature of living under authoritarianism: to have a widespread conspiracy theory that the incumbent was replaced by the double. Get used to it.

[–] 0x0@lemmy.dbzer0.com 16 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)
[–] SkybreakerEngineer@lemmy.world 9 points 3 weeks ago

Trump is already a mushroom, just ask Stormy Daniels

[–] vivalapivo@lemmy.today 8 points 3 weeks ago

"Trump is a mushroom" will occur in 20 years when the population finds it unable to exist in a reality without Trump.

[–] toynbee@lemmy.world 12 points 3 weeks ago

Wait, Paul isn't dead?

[–] VinnyDaCat@lemmy.world 9 points 3 weeks ago (4 children)

Yeah the cultists that voted him in who are starting to realize what is really unfolding in our country can't believe it. "It can't really be him, he loves us, he cares for us! It must be a fake!"

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[–] Damage@feddit.it 63 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)

If he hasn't, can we start a conspiracy theory that he's been replaced?

[–] Blubber28@lemmy.world 27 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

What do you mean "theory," he definitely has been

;)

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[–] jballs@sh.itjust.works 55 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)
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[–] hellfire103@lemmy.ca 51 points 3 weeks ago
[–] Bebopalouie@lemmy.ca 50 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)

And I am saving this for when the child molester is dead.

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[–] spankmonkey@lemmy.world 46 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

God damn it.

Don't give me hope.

[–] Berengaria_of_Navarre@lemmy.world 35 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

Great! 11½ years of Vance 😥

[–] princessnorah@lemmy.blahaj.zone 42 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)

If following the law, which let's face it, they won't, then it would only be 7½ years of Vance. According to the 22nd Amendment if anyone takes over for the President before the two year mark, then they are only allowed to run for one extra term. If they take over after the two year mark then they may run for two more terms, for a maximum of ten years.

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[–] TropicalDingdong@lemmy.world 21 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (1 children)

There is about a 0 percent chance Vance wins an election without Trump's coat tails to ride.

Vance will not be able to hold the coalition together.

[–] Berengaria_of_Navarre@lemmy.world 12 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

Cute that you think you'll get elections.

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[–] ArchmageAzor@lemmy.world 33 points 3 weeks ago

Don't get my hopes up

[–] morphballganon@mtgzone.com 32 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Nah we'll know when he does. More likely he's ill, possibly on the way out.

[–] Lucidlethargy@sh.itjust.works 26 points 3 weeks ago
[–] aBundleOfFerrets@sh.itjust.works 25 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

supreme leaders cannot die. they simply pass the torch to the next chosen

[–] bmpvy@feddit.org 17 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

What's the story behind this?

[–] bdonvr@thelemmy.club 26 points 3 weeks ago (4 children)

He hasn't made any public appearance in a few days and cancelled some this weekend iirc

It's probably nothing but damn wouldn't it be funny

[–] baggachipz@sh.itjust.works 11 points 3 weeks ago

~~funny~~ fucking glorious

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[–] ToastedPlanet@lemmy.blahaj.zone 18 points 3 weeks ago

The rumor mill is running late into the night on BlueSky and apparently Twitter. I haven't seen anything compelling. But I'm still awake so...

[–] fuckgod@feddit.online 15 points 3 weeks ago

This is so real. I was literally finally laying down when my brother got me with this.

[–] KazuchijouNo@lemy.lol 13 points 3 weeks ago

Please let me wake up to a brighter world. For once, pls

[–] pyre@lemmy.world 13 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (4 children)

i thought the fourth panel would be her finally getting a good night's sleep.

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[–] alx@piefed.blahaj.zone 12 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

he never was alive to begin with

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[–] salacious_coaster@infosec.pub 10 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] ToastedPlanet@lemmy.blahaj.zone 10 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)
[–] ChaoticNeutralCzech@feddit.org 18 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (1 children)

"Trump dead" has a cleaner graph because it's a 10x more common way people phrase it.

[–] ToastedPlanet@lemmy.blahaj.zone 17 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

I'm from the 20th century. We spoke differently back then.

[–] ChaoticNeutralCzech@feddit.org 32 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (3 children)

No, you didn't.

Stars&Stripes Newspaper: "Hitler Dead"

It's just that people are looking for headlines.

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[–] salacious_coaster@infosec.pub 14 points 3 weeks ago

Just popped over to Bsky to look. Don't tease me, universe...

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