this post was submitted on 02 Sep 2025
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[–] BilboBargains@lemmy.world 32 points 3 days ago

Bone apple tea

[–] dxc@sh.itjust.works 228 points 5 days ago (12 children)

I am outraged by that bone-petite. Which bone is petite? Why does their bacon have bones?!

[–] ook@discuss.tchncs.de 131 points 5 days ago (15 children)
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[–] AEGIS2317@feddit.org 146 points 5 days ago (3 children)

bone-petite is so cringe it caused me physical pain

[–] SkaveRat@discuss.tchncs.de 29 points 5 days ago

I do think their bone is quite petite

[–] Hupf@feddit.org 24 points 4 days ago (8 children)
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[–] stoy@lemmy.zip 158 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) (23 children)

I find direct offensive bigots really interesting, they clearly have problems in their life, and their response to these problems is to create MORE problems.

I have enough problems in my life to try and actively stir up more of them.

[–] AngryCommieKender@lemmy.world 74 points 5 days ago (6 children)

Whenever I encounter a problem in my life, I toss a molotov cocktail. That immediately turns into a different problem.

[–] notabot@piefed.social 46 points 5 days ago (3 children)

This is the mathematician's approach. When faced with a novel problem seek to reduce it to a known problem, and solve that. This assumes you know how to solve the problem of everything being on fire.

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[–] AcidiclyBasicGlitch@sh.itjust.works 52 points 4 days ago (5 children)
[–] python@lemmy.world 9 points 4 days ago (3 children)

I actively disliked bacon looong before going vegan. It smells bad and the amount of fat that renders out when you cook it is just plain uncanny. Why is it never a high-quality french Jambon or Prosciutto with those people?

[–] Throskie@midwest.social 7 points 3 days ago

They can't spell those words, for starters.

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[–] unphazed@lemmy.world 33 points 4 days ago (2 children)

Ah yes, Christian Nationalist attacks on other Abrahamic religions. How's that poly blend mask fitting these days?

[–] brotundspiele@sh.itjust.works 20 points 3 days ago (2 children)
[–] Malfeasant@lemmy.world 6 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Too many nots, I'm tangled.

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[–] irmadlad@lemmy.world 3 points 3 days ago

Do these people who claim to be Christian even know their beloved book?

Very, very few. It's really frustrating when talking to them because of their ignorance of their own operations manual. As an agnostic, I'm embarrassed for them. I took the time to read it many many many times along with the Mormon text, Hindu religions, Janeism, Buddhism, etc and about 3 years ago I finally finished the English translation of the Quran. They can't seem to handle one book.

And I do not say these things from any moral high ground or superiority. However, if you come to my door and tell me I'm going to eternal damnation because I do not believe in the same way they do, their book, and their god, then they better bring their A game.

America was founded by people fleeing religious persecution from the government installed in their homeland, official Church. They left us two principals to live by. Freedom of religion....that's them, and most importantly, freedom from religion, that's me.IMHO we can all coexist given 3 criteria are strictly met:

  • Lawful: that's obvious
  • Peaceful: Another obvious
  • Stays out of my politics: One not so very obvious to a lot of people. That is by design. When ever you have a religiously dominated government, it always, always, always turns out bad.

Give a man someone to hate and he's bend over and spread his cheeks for your amusement. (Paraphrased LBJ)

[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 9 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Bacon is to Muslims as Broccoli is to a White Nationalist.

[–] some_kind_of_guy@lemmy.world 6 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (2 children)

I travel around my (deep purple) state with a satchel of various brassicas. Going out of the house in this area without a curated collection of cruciferous comestibles would be like going into a hot war without merely a sidearm.

  • Everyone knows that any green thing can ward off the common MAGA chud, but many are unaware that so-called "enlightened" centrists are actually attracted to broccoli. Don't be fooled. For them, you must brandish brussels sprouts - preferably still attached to a long stalk. Then, launch into a cooking lesson, but do NOT DETACH OR BOIL THE SPROUTS. You will have your quarry at the first hint of Maillard's reaction, and they will either join your cause or become total hermits.
  • Liberals will claim to favor kale, but I've had success presenting them with multiple diverse varietials while explaining that "Lacinato" and "Dinosaur" are both equally accurate and acceptable terms when used to refer to the bumpy, dark green kind. Your utter indifference to - and rejection of - their "correct" preference will eventually send them into a blind, self-destructive rage - if you're patient and hold the line. Just be sure to stand outside their blast radius when they finally go.
  • You must be creative and self-assured when it comes to libertarians, but try showing off a fresh romanesco cauliflower while delivering a long-winded (but efficient) diatribe in which you logically interweave fractals, calculus, coastlines, cacti, psychedelics and concepts of cognitive sovereignty. Once they sense that you have more than a surface-level understanding of these topics, and genuinely care about how they each relate to objective, consensus reality, they pathetically slink away like old goats, having fired not a single round of reloaded ammunition out of their bespoke 3d-printed handgun.

Good luck out there!

[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 2 points 2 days ago

10/10. Would read again.

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[–] RizzRustbolt@lemmy.world 48 points 4 days ago (2 children)

They think it works that way because that's the way it works for them.

Show them a picture of Mecca and they freak right the fuck out.

[–] madjo@feddit.nl 12 points 3 days ago (2 children)

Or talk about how you're eating less meat/became vegan and they'll act like you're demanding them to become vegan too.

[–] Masamune@lemmy.world 4 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I once told someone I enjoy eating meat. Later they caught me eating tofu, because I enjoy eating that too. It was fun watching them implode!

[–] DigitalAudio@sopuli.xyz 3 points 3 days ago

Their minds explode the moment they visit Japan, one of the least vegan friendly countries and simultaneously one of the most tofu loving ones

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[–] IAmNorRealTakeYourMeds@lemmy.world 25 points 4 days ago (10 children)

meanwhile they cry a tantrum when Starbucks uses red cups.

they are the most fragile people on the planet

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[–] Linkalee@sh.itjust.works 45 points 4 days ago

It's projection. If you showed them a rainbow or a Day of the Dead decoration, they'd get super offended and bent out of shape. And because that's how they react to things they don't like, they assume that's how everyone else reacts, too.

[–] bountygiver@lemmy.ml 6 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

It's always some kind of projection, these are the people who get triggered by the mere existence of LBGTQ people.

They legitimately think their reaction is normal so these posts would trigger the muslims too.

[–] Drusas@fedia.io 99 points 5 days ago

Speaking like a normal person and not a salesman is probably helping him quite a lot.

[–] ChonkyOwlbear@lemmy.world 44 points 4 days ago (6 children)

The best part of living in an area with a lot of Muslims is all the halal burger places that use beef bacon.

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[–] Trainguyrom@reddthat.com 36 points 4 days ago

I'm remembering a paragraph of one of the Witcher books where a vampire is at a fancy ball at a royal court and while eating a garlic soup with his silver spoon he was explaining in great detail to a patron seated near him that vampires are deathly afraid of silver and the slightest touch of silver will immediately kill them

[–] TheTechnician27@lemmy.world 63 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) (2 children)

I literally believe an innocent, defenseless, sentient creature was systematicallty and needlessly tortured and murdered to make this and that my tax dollars paid to subsidize it. If this isn't triggering to me, I can't even imagine how fucking stupid this looks to Muslims who think God forbids it. Like should someone fire back a video of themselves disregarding the Sabbath and expect Christians to care?

And isn't pork haram predominantly because it was considered by people like Muhammad to be impure? So this sounds more like someone sending them a video of scraping gum off the underside of a desk and chewing it. You sure owned them.

[–] Pyr_Pressure@lemmy.ca 68 points 5 days ago (10 children)

It was probably considered impure because pigs have a big parasite issue before industrialization and improper cooking often led to people getting sick or dying.

A lot of religious "rules" can typically be boiled down to trying to keep people alive by making sure they avoid potential dangerous things, increasing their hygiene, or just making life easier and reducing hardships.

It's almost like people in charge realized that it would be easier to get people to do things if it meant going to heaven and avoiding hell instead of jail or something.

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[–] mavu@discuss.tchncs.de 27 points 4 days ago (5 children)
[–] samus12345@sh.itjust.works 6 points 3 days ago

"Small bone"

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[–] RedFrank24@lemmy.world 26 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago) (2 children)

People seem to forget that Muslims are allowed to touch pork products, they're just not allowed to pray after touching them unless they ritualistically purify themselves by washing their hands, mouth, nose, face, forearms, head, ears and feet (the order is different as well as what parts you wash in different schools of thought).

Doing all that is a bit of a kerfuffle so a good number of Muslims just choose to avoid touching anything that could invalidate their purity, but the worst that can happen is they have to wash themselves again before they pray.

Obviously they're not allowed to eat it, but it's nowhere near as bad as racists would have you think where even being in the presence of pork products is enough to make Muslims melt into the floor like the wicked witch.

[–] phutatorius@lemmy.zip 11 points 4 days ago (6 children)

even being in the presence of pork products is enough to make Muslims melt into the floor like the wicked witch

Some Muslims really are like that. The ones who are, are usually from the more backward countries.

But Islam also says that if you're starving and pork is the only available food, eat the pork.

Alcohol, on the other hand, is a hard no.

Now in my view, I don't see how any religion that forbids carnitas can possibly be divinely inspired.

Even so, I've never met an Islamophobe who isn't a raving asshole, but I've met a number of Muslims who are good people, even if I don't agree with some of their religious prohibitions.

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[–] Grass@sh.itjust.works 25 points 4 days ago

same fuckers that loose their shit when I tell them I prefer dog bacon but I'm also kinda sick of it because I just got back from visiting family in china and my family doesn't cook much of the more well known dishes. we just eat wild/kennel dog and wild salad.

then I ask them why they let heir government officials shoot dogs for misbehaving when they haven't even been trained

[–] Revan343@lemmy.ca 25 points 4 days ago

bone-petite

[–] infinitesunrise@slrpnk.net 33 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) (2 children)

Critical vegan-halal solidarity against cringe meatposturing.

[–] ZILtoid1991@lemmy.world 27 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago) (9 children)

Meat eater here, I also don't like these cringey meat lovers. Worst are the carnivore diet evangelists, they'll call you vegan if you eat any plant based food.

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[–] HugeNerd@lemmy.ca 17 points 4 days ago (3 children)

duh it's "bone apple teeth" wut a dumass

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