this post was submitted on 22 Sep 2025
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Seriously, why do we even have to have this discussion?

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[–] themeatbridge@lemmy.world 45 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Why do we have to have these conversations? Because well-meaning (and some not so well meaning) men thought it was a good idea to warn women about the things women do and wear that force those men to think about assaulting women. Of course, they would never do such a thing, but they assume that rape and sexual assault could be avoided, or at least minimized, if women would stop teasing men so much.

And then there's a whole subclass of men who prefer to control women, and use examples of rape and sexual assault to demonstrate to the women they want to control that freedom has consequences. So whenever a woman is attacked, they blame her for refusing to follow the rules established by a Godly man.

So every so often, we get a list of "suggestions" that sound like common sense self-preservation instincts, but belie a subtext that is equal parts horrific and misogynist. Things like don't leave your drink unattended (because men drug and rape women) or travel in groups (because men isolate and rape women) or don't wear provocative clothing (because a horny man cannot help but rape a woman).

[–] medgremlin@midwest.social 3 points 2 weeks ago

And those same men are the ones that are so offended by women choosing the bear.

[–] greenhorn@lemmy.world 40 points 2 weeks ago

There's a longer list but I can't find the original source.

‘FIVE RAPE PREVENTION TIPS’

  1. If someone is drunk, don’t rape them.

  2. When you see someone walking by themselves, leave them alone.

  3. Use the Buddy System! If it is difficult for you to stop yourself from raping someone, ask a trusted friend to accompany you at all times.

  4. Carry a rape whistle. If you find that you are about to rape someone, blow the whistle until someone comes to stop you.

  5. Don’t forget: honesty is the best policy. When asking someone out, don’t pretend that you are interested in them as a person. Tell them straight up that you expect to be raping them later. If you don’t communicate your intentions, they may take it as a sign that you do not plan to rape them.”

[–] xxce2AAb@feddit.dk 29 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Sound advice, if incomplete. Addendum: If you have reason to think it isn't just a passing intrusive thought, and that you have to replace a lot of shirts, it might be cheaper to just have the warning permanently tattooed on your forehead.

[–] zqwzzle@lemmy.ca 14 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (2 children)

POOR IMPULSE CONTROL

Edit: this is a reference to Snow Crash in a similar situation.

[–] themeatbridge@lemmy.world 16 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I have poor impulse control. I've never raped anyone, because I've never wanted to rape anyone. That's not an impulse. It's the violent crime of an unrepentant sociopath, and if you need impulse control to avoid it, you're the problem.

Not you "you." I know what you meant.

[–] apprehensively_human@lemmy.ca 6 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

To paraphrase Penn Jillette, I rape as many people as I want every single day. And that number is zero.

[–] themeatbridge@lemmy.world 4 points 2 weeks ago

That's exactly the quote I was thinking of when I wrote that comment, I just didn't give him credit.

[–] xxce2AAb@feddit.dk 6 points 2 weeks ago

Accurate, but requires either a very large forehead or an asinine choice of font size.

[–] Soulg@ani.social 2 points 2 weeks ago

Or go to therapy.

[–] Gullible@sh.itjust.works 19 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)

“Bro, you see the sigma wearing the rape shirt? So based. I’m buying him a drink.”

Teens are literally speaking in dated 4chan lingo in my area, and it makes me want to reenact a scene from American history x.

[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 21 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

it makes me want to reenact a scene from American history x.

The one where the high school professor teaches the kids about the historical conditions that lead to their modern day impoverished state?

[–] TherapyGary@lemmy.blahaj.zone 13 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

[not funny]

It is though?

Seriously, why do we even have to have this discussion?

I feel like maybe you're missing the author's joke

[–] NatakuNox@lemmy.world 6 points 2 weeks ago

And might I add that rapist don't care to follow this advice... Also, the vast majority of men and women (women are gaining grown on men) will never sexually assault anyone. The main issue is we don't support victims in America. Nearly every county across America has a back log of rape kits. Some red states back log is years long.

[–] axexrx@lemmy.world 1 points 2 weeks ago

He said it wasnt funny, but I couldn't help but chuckle at the mental image of #4

[–] orhtej2@eviltoast.org -5 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

It is though?

No, it's not funny.

I feel like maybe you’re missing the author’s joke

Am I? As long as the joke is about rape existing I don't find it funny, sorry.

[–] TherapyGary@lemmy.blahaj.zone 17 points 2 weeks ago

OOP is using irony (funny) to make a point about victim blaming. The joke isn't about sexual assault- it's about victim blaming.

[–] Jrockwar@feddit.uk 11 points 2 weeks ago

That's not the joke.

[–] moody 8 points 2 weeks ago

The joke is about subverting the all-too-common expectations of blaming the victim for getting raped by turning the blame back onto the rapists.

[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 5 points 2 weeks ago

Possibly the best advice on the subject I have seen posted to date.

[–] krunklom@lemmy.zip 2 points 2 weeks ago

If mad men were about rapists then Don Draper would have been called Ron Raper.