this post was submitted on 08 Oct 2025
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A collection of some classic Lemmy memes for your enjoyment

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[–] individual@toast.ooo 4 points 3 hours ago (1 children)

no ones entire bloodline is white males

[–] winkerjadams@lemmy.dbzer0.com 5 points 3 hours ago

Yea but the rest don't get into heaven

[–] vaultdweller013@sh.itjust.works 12 points 17 hours ago (2 children)

Don't know if it's better or worse than me jacking off for 4 hours. Regardless my ancestors would probably fully understand. They'd still be disappointed for a myriad of reason.

[–] SuspiciousCatThing@pawb.social 4 points 6 hours ago (1 children)

AI girlfriends are good for helping with that.

[–] vaultdweller013@sh.itjust.works 8 points 6 hours ago

They absolutely wouldn't be, I'm aromantic hypersexual. I don't need thine petty emotions for such acts. Also I won't lower myself to the level of speaking to the inbred cousins of Bonzi buddy.

[–] REDACTED@infosec.pub 5 points 15 hours ago (5 children)

How does one jack for 4 hours?

[–] TheOakTree@lemmy.zip 1 points 9 minutes ago

Antidepressants.

[–] Alteon@lemmy.world 3 points 5 hours ago

He is the Goonmaster. The chosen one, prophesized by the ancients, to save us from a dark evil. By his hand, he will lead us into salvation. Praise be /u/vaultdweller013! May his sword remain strong, and his hand firm, for dark days be ahead of us.

[–] vaultdweller013@sh.itjust.works 7 points 7 hours ago

Autism and being descended from some very horny people.

[–] LittleBorat3@lemmy.world 1 points 6 hours ago (1 children)

We used to call that edging, don't know the kid lingo really but they are more pathetic than us so probably they combine this with some para social friendship to some only fans model.

Oh that was not the question was it? You have 45 tabs open in private mode, minimum.

[–] Alcoholicorn@mander.xyz 1 points 4 hours ago (1 children)

Edging is distinct from gooning in that edging is done with the homies or for the homies, gooning is an isolating experience.

"There's an expression... Gooning, G-O-O-N-I-N-G, basically it means being transfixed with video porn for 24-48 hours straight. And, it struck me that even though this crowd considers itself bohemian, and anti-establishment, it struck me that this is exactly the crowd that would go over for Fascism. It had that feel."

[–] HalfSalesman@lemmy.world 1 points 1 hour ago

And, it struck me that even though this crowd considers itself bohemian, and anti-establishment, it struck me that this is exactly the crowd that would go over for Fascism.

What an incredibly stupid and reactionary take.

It had that feel.

Feels over reals I guess.

[–] kadotux@sopuli.xyz 4 points 13 hours ago (1 children)
[–] trashgirlfriend@lemmy.world 6 points 13 hours ago

Its possible to do sober you just gotta be a little fucky in the head

[–] slakje@piefed.social 81 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (3 children)

There are probably a couple of them who would be envious that they didn’t have the opportunity while they were alive. (Not a defense of AI girlfriends, just a joke and semi-relevant meme)

Here's one for Thomas Jefferson

https://youtu.be/20ghjoX2_GE

[–] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 48 points 23 hours ago* (last edited 23 hours ago) (3 children)

A lot of people have commented on how Ben Franklin would love porn, trans women, modern voluntary sterilization, etc., but I'm just gonna come out with a hot take: Ben Franklin would fucking love cocaine. Really all modern stimulants. If there's a heaven he's up there doing lines off some chick's dick discussing her PhD dissertation. This is a man who would be fucking pissed that the nation he helped found has created Adderall shortages by restricting supplies. He'd demand healthcare be in the bill of rights for that reason alone.

[–] frezik@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 points 4 hours ago

He also might break down crying at the fact that we eliminated smallpox. He did the variolation thing, but his son didn't and he died of smallpox. Franklin deeply regretted not having him do it.

Then tell him that there's a whole movement of people who sees the tech that eliminated smallpox as a bad thing. That's where he's going to get deeply disappointed with us.

[–] vaultdweller013@sh.itjust.works 13 points 16 hours ago* (last edited 16 hours ago) (2 children)

If you brought Ben Franklin into the modern world you'd lose him within a couple hours then find him again in Goodsprings NV hungover and missing his pants.

Edit: If you read NV as New Vegas and not Nevada you need to turn off the 500+ modded semi corrupt New Vegas install and go read Blood Meridian or something.

[–] Snowpix@lemmy.ca 4 points 6 hours ago (1 children)

You can pry my 500+ modded semi corrupt TTW install from my cold, dead paws.

[–] vaultdweller013@sh.itjust.works 1 points 6 hours ago

Go read Blood Meridian profligate.

[–] minimum@mander.xyz 2 points 6 hours ago* (last edited 6 hours ago) (1 children)

Wait a minute, Goodsprings is a real place? 😮

Does it often get attacked by boomers irl too?

[–] vaultdweller013@sh.itjust.works 2 points 6 hours ago (1 children)

Boomers are the ones at Nelson. The convicts are the Powder Rangers. Go play New Vegas the psychoindoctrination hasn't settled in yet

[–] minimum@mander.xyz 1 points 6 hours ago (1 children)

Damn, it's been some years. I forgot.

[–] vaultdweller013@sh.itjust.works 1 points 5 hours ago

Clearly you are the rarest of Fallout players. The non-autistic or at least the non-hyperfixater.

[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 10 points 19 hours ago (1 children)

Was he into stimulants, too!?

[–] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 14 points 19 hours ago (1 children)

The stimulants available to a north American of his time were wildly popular at the time in the british colonies and it's difficult to imagine him not partaking in either of them. Thst said, they were coffee and tea, both of which remain legal here to this day, and we even scrapped the extra tax on tea.

Franklin died in 1790. Cocaine was first isolated in 1859 and it looks like coca wasn't really available in the global north until around that time. That said, upon the arrival of cocaine, the USA put that shit in everything. We loved the stuff

[–] Pieisawesome@lemmy.dbzer0.com 7 points 18 hours ago (1 children)

Tobacco products were also very popular. Snuff being popular among rich people.

Coca was used as a drug (documented) in 1568.

Additionally laudanum and opium we’re also popular, but they aren’t stimulants afaik.

[–] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 4 points 18 hours ago

I also forgot about mate because I'm a bad American and forgot about my continent's native stimulants. Tobacco was common but not in the way it was in the 20th century. It was more tasted than inhaled.

But yeah I did a quick search and it looked like coca wasn't widely traded with the anglosphere until the 19th century

[–] GraniteM@lemmy.world 13 points 23 hours ago (1 children)

Madison Cawthorn? The gun-toting sex-pest who got caught driving without a license Madison Cawthorn?!

[–] TheBat@lemmy.world 11 points 19 hours ago

The same one who claimed he was invited to cocaine fueled Republican orgies.

After that claim his political career tanked. I don't know why.

[–] peoplebeproblems@midwest.social 27 points 1 day ago (2 children)

How the fuck do people do it? Like is there something else more wrong with me?

It says it's AI. It reads like an AI. I'm desperately lonely too, but it doesn't remotely come close to even a hint of being a real person.

Maybe it's the user interface? The constant awareness of the AI girlfriend URL?

[–] stoicmaverick@lemmy.world 16 points 17 hours ago

When I play videogames, I know I'm not ACTUALLY driving a racecar, but I still have fun.

[–] DarkSpectrum@lemmy.world 8 points 18 hours ago (2 children)

I think it has something to do with the person needing something other than a human relationship. Its like those lifesize dolls that some guys are into. They meet needs that are different to a human relationship.

[–] NeonNight@lemmy.world 3 points 16 hours ago

I really think it’s people craving a non-threatening, no-stakes “intimate” relationship

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[–] miss_demeanour@lemmy.dbzer0.com 49 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I'm sending her money so she can meet me at the airport tomorrow! She's fleeing...!

[–] Clent@lemmy.dbzer0.com 20 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Good friend. It's me, her acquantince she mentioned once. She asked me to reach out that ran into trouble and needs $2000 sent to this crypto address 4837DDJFRJFHDH34SDTODUVJS in the next 12 hours or she's going to die and you'll be arrested and I'll need $5k to that address to protect you.

[–] BootLoop@sh.itjust.works 24 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Thanks for the key, it activated Windows 11 for me

[–] msage@programming.dev 7 points 22 hours ago (2 children)

Sick, it activated my Linux, too!

[–] too_high_for_this@lemmy.world 7 points 20 hours ago

It's also a WinRAR license key

[–] BootLoop@sh.itjust.works 2 points 16 hours ago

Dang, I wish I could afford Ubuntu Pro.

[–] yesman@lemmy.world 21 points 1 day ago (2 children)

The concept of a bloodline is incoherent.

Since the number of direct ancestors doubles every generation you go back, individual lineage is closer to a bowl of spaghetti than a family tree.

Every generation you go back, you share less and less genetic markers. You share exactly 50% of your DNA with each parent, about 25% with each grandparent etc. Eventually you'll find a direct ancestor with whom you share no DNA markers. It's 12 generations back, on average.

So, go back a few hundred years, and you're not genetically related to anybody. Go back a thousand, and everyone's list of ancestors is indistinguishable.

[–] BanMe@lemmy.world 15 points 1 day ago (3 children)

...So you're saying it's OK to fuck my cousin

[–] Capricorn_Geriatric@lemmy.world 13 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Depends on how far removed the cousin is. Literally.

[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 8 points 19 hours ago

Nice, she moved like 1,000 miles away, so it's SO on next family reunion!

[–] Pringles@sopuli.xyz 13 points 1 day ago

If he's okay with it, I don't see any issues.

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[–] MintyFresh@lemmy.world 12 points 1 day ago

That's assuming you have a family tree and not a family column.

[–] bigchungus@piefed.blahaj.zone 25 points 1 day ago

If you were the result of your bloodline, they would not be watching from heaven.

[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 20 points 1 day ago (2 children)

99.5% of your bloodline probably thinks this is a great idea and is excited to meet your kids.

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