this post was submitted on 14 Oct 2025
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Funny: Home of the Haha

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[–] miraclerandy@lemmy.world 118 points 3 days ago (3 children)

Friendly reminder that the reason we get funny headlines like this from Florida is that the state allows the media full access to their police records so they can find stories like this

[–] carl_dungeon@lemmy.world 42 points 3 days ago (3 children)

But also because Florida is full of these.

[–] Rekorse@sh.itjust.works 19 points 3 days ago

So is my state, but they dont allow this type of thing.

[–] doingthestuff@lemy.lol 16 points 3 days ago

It's fun to look up your birthday month and day and add Florida man or Florida woman to the search, and then look for the best headlines.

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[–] umbrella@lemmy.ml 11 points 3 days ago (3 children)

i find this... strangely reasonable for florida? seems to have the potential to bring accountability, at least on paper.

what do usians think of this?

[–] CompactFlax@discuss.tchncs.de 44 points 3 days ago (2 children)

“Innocent until proven guilty” but also your photo is published for posterity so when someone puts your name into their favourite search engine it’s the first thing to pop up, next to a crime you didn’t commit.

[–] umbrella@lemmy.ml 3 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

that's a great point against it.

[–] Rooster326@programming.dev 4 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (1 children)

The alternative is you try to find Jimmy but he's fucking gone. The state took him away and there is no record. He's just gone, arrested, sent who knows where.

Though the point is moot because now the federal government is doing that everyday to whoever they want.

[–] danc4498@lemmy.world 3 points 2 days ago (1 children)
[–] SkaveRat@discuss.tchncs.de 5 points 2 days ago (1 children)

His vessel was detained.

[–] AnUnusualRelic@lemmy.world 22 points 3 days ago

In theory, however it also publicises stories of wrongfully accused people for example. This can have some unwanted and serious repercussions.

All in all I tend to believe that it's better to let the judicial system work in peace and without an excess of publicity.

I'm not usian though, so I'm not considering the monetary angle.

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[–] shalafi@lemmy.world 3 points 2 days ago (1 children)

We're also the 3rd most populous state. It's also easier to get up to shenanigans when you're not locked inside by a 40' wall of snow and ice.

[–] ripcord@lemmy.world 2 points 2 days ago

Also there's a bunch of absolute gibbering morons in the state. That also helps.

[–] Lembot_0004@discuss.online 42 points 3 days ago (11 children)

Judge: That's why it is called "driving under the influence", and it doesn't matter when the drinking happened. Influence is important, not the fact of drinking.

[–] x00z@lemmy.world 16 points 3 days ago

"I wasn't influenced by the booze. It was my own choice."

[–] Zachariah@lemmy.world 13 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Defendant: Nuh, uh. Everyone knows it’s called “DWI”—driving while intoxicated—which doesn’t really help me either, does it?

[–] peoplebeproblems@midwest.social 8 points 3 days ago (1 children)

"Your honor, I was not being influenced by the drink I had. It did not say or act in any way such that my behavior would change. Secondly, I was not driving while intoxicated. Intoxicated as defined by the dictionary literally says 'stupefied by alcohol.' that cannot have happened because at no point was I stupid."

[–] SeductiveTortoise@piefed.social 5 points 3 days ago (2 children)
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[–] AnUnusualRelic@lemmy.world 11 points 3 days ago

Curses! Foiled again!

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[–] saltnotsugar@lemmy.world 20 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Lawyer: Dude, this defense is so rock solid.

[–] Welt@lazysoci.al 3 points 2 days ago

Hey did you happen to get bit by a dog? 'Cause I'm kind of a mack at dog bites.

[–] pjwestin@lemmy.world 13 points 2 days ago (2 children)

I hope this is the beginning of a new Sovereign Citizen style movement that uses hyper-literal misinterpretations of the law as a defense.

[–] tempest@lemmy.ca 9 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I feel like the law is not drunk driving but something more like "operating a motor vehicle with a blood alcohol level above something something..."

[–] pjwestin@lemmy.world 9 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Yeah, it's usually Driving Under the Influence (DUI) or Driving While Intoxicated (DWI), not, "Drinking and Driving." But its not like facts have any influence over the Sovereign Citizen movement, so I don't see why we should start here.

[–] krooklochurm@lemmy.ca 2 points 2 days ago

This won't be a socereign citizen movement. It will be a literally legal learning lawyering.

[–] leftzero@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 2 days ago

New? People being people I'm sure we must have been attempting this kind of defense since Hammurabi, if not earlier...

[–] SocialMediaRefugee@lemmy.world 10 points 2 days ago

This is how little kids argue. lol

[–] Reygle@lemmy.world 10 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Wait, her argument is it's the act of drinking (actually passing the liquid into your mouth) that's illegal?

[–] pyre@lemmy.world 5 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

i guess she's going by the "don't drink and drive" rule, a little too literally. but the law obviously doesn't say that; it says under influence/while intoxicated, so even on a technicality she doesn't pass.

[–] DeathByBigSad@sh.itjust.works 7 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (1 children)

I'm not driving, I'm traveling! 😁

(I used to hate SovCits, but honestly tho, now Americans need more "SovCits" more than ever, there's not enough resistance. I kinda sympathize with them now, they're just a little confused, but got the spirit. Where all the "anti-tyranny" people at? 🤔)

(Edit: And yes I see the article is from 2024)

I don't think sovcits care about the larger picture of legalism, per se, as much as finding loopholes in it that they can then close after themselves. The ones who want to share their, uh, "discoveries" about manipulating The Man seem to want to sell what they know at a premium.

[–] SeductiveTortoise@piefed.social 17 points 3 days ago (2 children)

In Germany, you are allowed to drink while driving if you stay below the limit.

You will 100% get pulled over for a funny test, though.

[–] moobythegoldensock@infosec.pub 8 points 3 days ago (4 children)

Interesting. In the US, most jurisdictions have open container laws: A drink needs to be either factory sealed or in a place where it is not readily accessible (such as a trunk) or the driver is in violation.

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[–] Lembot_0004@discuss.online 10 points 3 days ago (3 children)

Funny test? A policeman tells a joke and... what is it, actually?

[–] lugal@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 3 days ago

German has a word for it: "Try not to laugh challenge" (we have a lot of anglicisms)

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[–] NutWrench@lemmy.ml 11 points 2 days ago (4 children)

Yeah, the magic word in the law isn't "driving." It's "while intoxicated." You don't suddenly stop being drunk when you put your beer away. Human physiology doesn't work that way.

[–] blockheadjt@sh.itjust.works 7 points 2 days ago

Ah but you are assuming Floridians can read, classic blunder

[–] humanspiral@lemmy.ca 7 points 2 days ago

Listen up liberal MADD atheists! If you tell us to not drink and drive, then don't make shit up, when we drink when not driving. This is just like the IRS going after criminal fraudulent conservative religious groups. It's a witch hunt!!!!

[–] lazyViking@lemmy.world 3 points 2 days ago

Of course the ml had to explain it 😂

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[–] psx_crab@lemmy.zip 13 points 3 days ago

When someone said they don't drink:

[–] Corelli_III@midwest.social 7 points 3 days ago (3 children)

making fun of people's mugshots is conservative slop

imagine finding it fun to humiliate people you've captured with your unlimited monopoly on state violence, seems pretty fash cucked to me

[–] Fluffy_Ruffs@lemmy.world 14 points 2 days ago (2 children)

I agree with the sentiment but there isn't a single post in this thread commenting on the appearance of the mugshot.

[–] Iceman@lemmy.world 6 points 2 days ago

Pointing out apropos of nothing, that it's an appearance to make fun of, is in itself a similar behavior to what is being criticized.

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[–] axexrx@lemmy.world 8 points 2 days ago (2 children)

Im not seeing any other comments here talking about her looks?

And i think going after drunk drivers is one of the things im pretty okay with the state using its 'unlimited monopoly on violence' for.

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[–] lagomorphlecture@lemmy.world 2 points 2 days ago (1 children)

When I was like 4 I went nuts on my mom for drinking and driving. Nevermind that it was a diet coke...

I was that kid, too, but about smoking.

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