this post was submitted on 05 Oct 2023
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Memes

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[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 219 points 2 years ago (3 children)

For non-Americans, Fort Wayne is very, very far from the ocean. Like a long distance, then over a huge mountain range and then another long distance.

[–] seliaste@lemmy.blahaj.zone 36 points 2 years ago (1 children)

If it is a package from China it wouldnt change anything right?

[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 87 points 2 years ago (4 children)

I would think that no matter where it's coming from, falling into the ocean in Fort Wayne would be a neat trick.

[–] Nindelofocho@lemmy.world 62 points 2 years ago (1 children)

clipped through the terrain and fell to the bottom of the map where the global water level is set at

[–] tryptaminev@feddit.de 9 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Thats what happens when you cheap out on map designers and have one old guy do everything that grew up in a time before computers were a thing even. Oh and of course he is also the only guy programming and maintaining the engine, has to do all the character conception and management demands some immersive sandbox experience with particle physics down to quantum level.

No wonder the updates just get shittier and shittier.

[–] oatscoop@midwest.social 9 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (1 children)

Nah, they didn't grow up before computers: they were programing mainframes in the 60s. Those programmers can write you an absolute masterpiece of software ... in COBOL. Also, they don't bother with documentation because they're intimately familiar with every line of code considering they created the whole system from scratch 40 years ago.

The point at when you're "screwed" is when they retire and some poor bastard inherits an inscrutably complex system, written in a 60 year old language no one uses anymore, and with zero documentation.

[–] jaybone@lemmy.world 16 points 2 years ago (1 children)

But does Fort Wayne just mean it’s the next checkpoint on the way to the destination?

So could easily be some port on the west coast where the container fell off a ship?

[–] mindrover@lemm.ee 10 points 2 years ago (2 children)

Most likely but it's funnier if you don't think about that.

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[–] FordBeeblebrox@lemmy.world 8 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Maybe they’re testing out hypersonic mail planes. You lose a box somewhere over Fort Wayne and you’re just goin so goddamn fast it doesn’t land till it hits the gulf

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[–] octoperson@sh.itjust.works 22 points 2 years ago

Thanks. This was useful context.

[–] grue@lemmy.world 7 points 2 years ago (2 children)

What mountains? There aren't any mountains between Fort Wayne and Mobile, AL. (Or between it and Fort Albany, ON, for that matter)

[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 14 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Congratulations, you got me. The Appalachians don't go all the way across the entire North American continent. I apologize for daring to make such a suggestion.

[–] grue@lemmy.world 11 points 2 years ago (3 children)

To be fair, I initially wanted to comment about how clever you were because even most Americans would forget about the Ozarks being in the way, but then I checked a map and realized they were too far west.

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[–] Hossenfeffer@feddit.uk 66 points 2 years ago (2 children)

Did they at least take a photo of the package having been successfully delivered into the ocean?

[–] Jimmycrackcrack@lemmy.ml 7 points 2 years ago (1 children)
[–] jaybone@lemmy.world 4 points 2 years ago

It’s in a fiberglass submarine.

[–] TheRaven@lemmy.ca 4 points 2 years ago

Maybe with one ship worker screaming out “WILSOOON!!!”

[–] RizzRustbolt@lemmy.world 45 points 2 years ago (2 children)

Ah yes... the famous Indiana Ocean.

[–] RogueAozame@programming.dev 7 points 2 years ago

I'm an idiot I read that as Indian ocean and thought somebody didn't know it exists. No I just can't read apparently.

[–] droans@lemmy.world 3 points 2 years ago

It's a long trip from the Maumee to the Erie to the Hudson to the ocean.

[–] Jimmycrackcrack@lemmy.ml 44 points 2 years ago

It still says its in transit so I guess it'll bob back up again any day now.

[–] son_named_bort@lemmy.world 39 points 2 years ago (1 children)

What a weird place for it to fall into the ocean.

[–] DmMacniel@feddit.de 11 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Well at least better then a fire at a sea parks.

[–] Rukmer@lemmy.world 5 points 2 years ago (1 children)

I mean, if she has said that her parent are drowned, I'd be the happiest man in the world. But, a fire?

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[–] Zimmy@lemm.ee 36 points 2 years ago

In the seaside town of Fort Wayne, IN 🤔

[–] Besen@feddit.de 34 points 2 years ago (1 children)
[–] ace_garp@lemmy.world 20 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)
[–] redw04@lemmy.ca 32 points 2 years ago

Maritime salvage rules apply, get a boat and go reclaim not only your package but everyone else's!

[–] pastermil@sh.itjust.works 26 points 2 years ago (2 children)
[–] TrustingZebra@lemmy.one 11 points 2 years ago
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[–] Dasnap@lemmy.world 21 points 2 years ago (1 children)
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[–] Lawyerator@lemmy.world 18 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Getting an Oregon Trail vibe from that message.

[–] Imgonnatrythis@sh.itjust.works 6 points 2 years ago

Package delayed due to:

Arrowed!

[–] BackOnMyBS@lemmy.world 17 points 2 years ago (1 children)

that shit happened to us on naval ships a few times while underway, but they recovered the mail. people were smoking dunked cigarettes lol

[–] jcg@halubilo.social 5 points 2 years ago

I'm sure naval officers are no strangers to wet cigarettes

[–] LordOfTheChia@lemmy.world 12 points 2 years ago

Package was being delivered by GOB Bluth.

"Return from whence you came!"

[–] Luisp@lemmy.dbzer0.com 11 points 2 years ago

Killer whale anti boat conspiracy in action

[–] Vitaly@feddit.uk 10 points 2 years ago (2 children)
[–] FinalRemix@lemmy.world 25 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Nah, Amazon just disables tracking altogether as soon as it's running late.

[–] Speculater@lemmy.world 10 points 2 years ago (3 children)

People might think you're joking, but they literally just did that to me last month.

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[–] SnipingNinja@slrpnk.net 18 points 2 years ago

That's a river, not Ocean

[–] sim642@lemm.ee 7 points 2 years ago

Did they jump after it to scan the barcode for a tracking update or what?

[–] Fedizen@lemmy.world 6 points 2 years ago

gonna be a wet package

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