Eggshittification
this post was submitted on 29 Apr 2025
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I'm gonna lie to my kids and tell them this is the plot of Orwell's Animal Farm.
They have a cunning plan regarding the humans...
With suitable prodding, you can get surprisingly great speed out of a chicken, the problem is that guidance is all over the place.
enshittification
https://livingurbanhomestead.com/how-does-a-chicken-lay-eggs/
The cloaca or vent is the last passage through which the egg travels out of the body. It is also the passage for fecal matter at the end of the digestive tract to be expelled outside the body of the hen.
Hens might have invented enshittification before marketing did. Literally.
Hold up. A chicken’s lungs are on its back?
Aren't yours?
Mine are in my arms.
Lucky! Mine are in my ears!
You guys have lungs?
Best I can do is gills.
Throw in a pair of black Speedos with a flame design on the sides for extra underwater speed and you've got yourself a deal, buddy!
I will never be able to look at chickens the same
printing and laser etching on egg shells are already a thing. so ads on eggs could very well become a thing, too.. especially if putting production codes or dates directly on them becomes required somewhere--if you're gonna run 'em all through the 'printer' might as well get paid to do it.
But eggs are already stamped with production location routinely where I live for decades, no ads yet
Ads on eggs
Don't give them any ideas, this sounds like it just might be doable and they may seriously consider it
Its pretty considerable ngl. Eggs have blank shells. Advertizing has no limits!
Chicken-shittify?
Enchickification
Egg-Shittification
Where are the farmers tariffs?
What will they do with the money?
Spoil cocks
Invest in AI and automate egg production, so they can fire half the chickens and con investors for more money
I'll sell you this NFT, so that you and only you can own this egg forever!
Buy eggs
Is this surreggacy?
Dropshipping
Mealworms
How about in egg egg satisfaction surveys?
Do your worst, I don't even eat eggs.
I guess you got rent to pay.
You might be able to charge more for the eggs if you feed them to a civet cat first and then collect the egg laden civet cat shit and sell that as some kind of delicacy.
When you break the egg an ad jingle plays for Eggbeaters
Haha
That chicken looks angry.
You would be too if someone cut you in half
I was really mad last time that happened.
Ehh, I've had worse.
Source but IG ugh, someone got a message to them asking for fediverse posts? https://www.instagram.com/thisecommercelife/