She call me Mr. Boombastic
Sacabambaspis
this post was submitted on 01 Jun 2025
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Wow. This is epic internet!
lololo
It has a South Park mouth
The eyes would suggest it's a predator.
Or just that it needs to focus on from of itself like filter crabs, or that it needs to see through things like kelp forests or hole enterances.
Given it's size and the extreme binocular vision, it's unlikely to have any ambush predators.
I looked it up, it has bony plates all over it's body and likely a lateral line, so seeing predators directly may have been less necessary. It was also a suction feeder, so likely an active predator of much smaller things. It may have needed good forward vision because it's maneuverability was poor.
That's what I thought! I'm too stupid to make anything more of it here for this community though
Prototype fish
How does it maneuver without any fins?
Not well. That's why most of its ancestors have fins nowadays
Don't you mean its descendants?
I often wonder that about your mom
This fish foresaw that evolution would lead to celebrity news, Return To Office mandates, and oversized utes, and decided it was happy precisely where it was.
"When we shine ze light on it..."
Zeeky booky doog
Preschool teacher: draw a happy fish Preschool student:
Modern fish are often dark on top and light underneath to fool prey/predators but also often colorful. Why do they assume one evolutionary step over the other? That beautiful blimpie belly calls out for decoration!
Functional changes in coloration are much "easier" (read: more likely) to develop through random mutation than functional changes to complex mechanical structures like bone structure or musculature. Given their predecessors were already under selective pressure by predation for millions of years prior, it's reasonable to assume they'd developed countershading (light bottom, dark top). Plus current agnathans are usually pretty dull.
Edit: oh geez, I misunderstood your message. It totally could have been a rainbow party blimp. That mostly depends on what their habitat was like.
Thanks for editing not deleting because TIL!
Of course! I'm a biologist, I try to use my powers for good.
⦿ ⏷⦿
I would love to take one from its natural environment and force it to live in a small aquarium.
proto whale has an emoji face
Somethin’ like a fish.
I don't know why but this creature is funny, scary and ridiculous all at once
Oh. We evolved from a googley eyed water hamhock.
So... Millions of years ago, before Pikachu was surprised, we had this fish occupying its niche?
the source of all pikachu faces.
No, millions of years ago we were this fish
👁️👄👁️
Look! The Lobotomite has returned!
It's funny when looked sideways, but when looked from the front it's two distortion filters away from analog horror.
Horror already without filters. I'm going to see that thing in my nightmares, fuckin hell.
It is cute, isn't it?
That is such a shit fish. I love it.
🎶🎶Sacasacabambambaspapispis🎶🎶 🎶🎶Sacasacabambambsapapispis🎶🎶
As a matter of fact, don't let nothin' hold you back. If the Scat Man can do it, brother, so can you!
me when the event
Kinda looks like he is about to say "Out of cyan; replace ink cartridge."