I mean WTF is a horse gonna do with prep time?

Not to brag, but, with a little bit of trainig, I think I can easily win against a trout, as long as the fight is not in the water. But we're only talking hypotheticaly, of course. It would only come to that if the trout picks up the fight first and we don't manage to resolve our issue with healthy communication... I'm not a monster.

my toxic trait is thinking I could win a fight with a goose

A snake.

Because I'm Australian and grew up in the country, I was taught how to take them down with a sharpened shovel when I was five. Coincidentally, I got my first one a few months later in the garage when it rushed out of a tarpaulin toward me and I shoveled the head off, just like mum taught me. Common brown too (a.k.a Eastern Brown, but they're everywhere. One of the most venomous snakes in the world).

My next one was a red-belly black snake that rushed out of a log. I used a mallet to crush the head and was 6. Also one of the venomous snakes in the world. We have most of them here.

Always go straight for the head with distance and speed.

It may sound cruel to not try scare them into an area and call someone for removal, but they're just too dangerous. And if it's there, it's made territory there, so if you lose it it will definitely show up again. Most are aggressive, so you need to take the chance when you've got it because it's simply more dangerous not to and come off second best next time.

It's also common to deal with pythons, getting one sunbaking off the road or out of the house if it overstepped it's boundaries. We like those ones though and definitely don't hurt them, especially if they make home in the roof or under the house. They keep the possums and mice away, therefore the venomous ground snakes away. Roof python is snek bro and a very welcome guest. It's sad when you notice one's probably moved out :(

I can definitely kill an hour

I can fight a blue whale. The whale would fail to perceive me as a threat, and so when it wanders away I win by default.

NOT a cat... Don't ask me how I know.

I grew up in rural Canada. A guy I knew was drunk in the woods with friends and tried to ride a young deer that came up to them(the deer got used to people in that area feeding them, something that is not recommended) annnnnnd it beat the shit out of him and his 6 friends. He got a bad concussion and lost sight in one of his eyes.

Don't fuck with animals. They are built different.

Give me a pointy enough stick and my tribe can take down any animal

A fish, unless I'm underwater instead of it being on land

When my father was younger he devised a plan to drop down out of a tree onto the back of a deer and take it down with a knife. He said it beat the shit out of him with its antlers. So I think I could take down a doe, a deer, a female dear.

Wait wait wait, hear me out
A snail

Shark, as long as we are on land. I’d just outrun him then call coup by hitting him with a stick while he’s gasping for air. I guess at that point I could take on a blue whale, but that would just make me feel like a dick. I’ll stick with the shark. Any shark, any time, 1.5 miles inland.

Do you get immediate medical treatment after, and is it free?

You need to ask why, thats how you get the hour long explanation

Maybe an especially passive grasshopper?

A horse?! that guy is delusional... most men won't have the ability to defeat (unarmed) anything bigger than a medium size dog...

Anything bigger will likely overpower a regular human, most smaller would just be too fast or have different, naturally occurring weaponry to defeat us

House centipede. In fact, I could probably take on two of them!

Not three though.

But do not forget to specify, that you mean 'in a fight'.

Humans have no real advantages in a 1:1 fight agains most larger mammals. A lot have horns, tusks, claws…

Humans got their points in STA, AGI, and INT. We don’t defeat large mammals in unarmed combat. We can barely handle anything much larger than a boar with close arms like a spear.

No, we defeat large animals by outsmarting and outlasting them. And usually that only works when we are on the offense and have an advantage by stalking. In a fair fight that gets a lot more challenging. Horses are fucking fast. Persistence hunting may have worked, but that’s by us chasing the prey.

So, assuming we are facing head to head, at the start of the fight, I would probably fake to the right, then run past the horse on my left. It’ll take him a while to turn around. That’ll buy me a few seconds to hopefully run somewhere where there are some obstacles or corners on the way to higher ground. If I can climb and get above the horse, all bets are off. Only Nirn horses are decent climbers.

Assuming it's bare-handed, what the best generic strategy to use? Try to crush it if it's small enough and strangle it if it's too big to crush?