this post was submitted on 13 May 2025
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Lemmy Shitpost

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Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

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[–] JackbyDev@programming.dev 1 points 1 hour ago

I'm in bed laying on my right side... So the ceiling fan? πŸ’€

Roll of toilet paper.

[–] Luma@feddit.org 2 points 6 hours ago (1 children)

Thankfully just a lip balm...

[–] JackbyDev@programming.dev 1 points 59 minutes ago

Too small, it's gonna get lost.

[–] Tungsten5@lemm.ee 1 points 5 hours ago

Perfect day* to be a martial artist

[–] bizzle@lemmy.world 4 points 9 hours ago (1 children)

It's my wife so I guess it depends on how much of her

[–] Cordyceps@sopuli.xyz 1 points 7 hours ago* (last edited 7 hours ago)

Hurry onward Lindsay Lohan, or you will soon be dead.

[–] altphoto@lemmy.today 1 points 6 hours ago

Today its luggage. I'm gonna need a lube wale...a belube wale.

[–] Gates9@sh.itjust.works 1 points 6 hours ago

I keep telling my girlfriend that yes, bulk liquid soap has its advantages, but have we really done a thorough analysis of the potential second and third order consequences?

Sharpie.

slightly concerned it doesn't have a flare but this isn't gonna go too wrong I don't think.

[–] mrslt@lemmy.world 4 points 11 hours ago

Well, my terrier is going up my ass, apparently. Sorry, boy.

[–] bruhbeans@lemmy.ml 4 points 11 hours ago

A jar. We all know how that ends.

[–] RBWells@lemmy.world 2 points 11 hours ago

Oh no it's my dog!

[–] thatradomguy@lemmy.world 2 points 11 hours ago

Air purifier....

[–] Thcdenton@lemmy.world 8 points 20 hours ago

A entire bedroom wall

[–] jim3692@discuss.online 4 points 18 hours ago
[–] owsei@programming.dev 6 points 22 hours ago

A double width bus chair

Fuck

[–] Chef_Boyardee@lemm.ee 14 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I'm not putting my cat up my butt, you fucking weirdo.

[–] Dragonstaff@leminal.space 8 points 1 day ago

You don't do everything a picture on the internet tells you to?

Its either a large flat screen or CRT that weighs like 70 pounds, I am going to die.

[–] Disorder6069@sh.itjust.works 1 points 19 hours ago

Floor to ceiling window…

[–] mechoman444@lemmy.world 2 points 22 hours ago

I am currently taking a dump... So the entire bathroom door. πŸ₯²

[–] MajesticElevator@lemmy.zip 2 points 22 hours ago

Computer πŸ‘€

[–] LoveSausage@discuss.tchncs.de 2 points 22 hours ago
[–] ftbd@feddit.org 2 points 23 hours ago

4 ft is about 1.2m - a Bo is typically around 1.8m

[–] sfled@lemm.ee 8 points 1 day ago

I now own a Browntooth speaker.

[–] trslim@pawb.social 77 points 2 days ago (2 children)
[–] BastingChemina@slrpnk.net 3 points 6 hours ago

My wife is on my left, it's going to be interesting

[–] kingpepe8006@sh.itjust.works 27 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

Well looks like u got the best option

[–] Venus_Ziegenfalle@feddit.org 70 points 2 days ago (5 children)
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[–] ThisIsAManWhoKnowsHowToGling@lemmy.dbzer0.com 27 points 1 day ago (4 children)
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[–] brokenlcd@feddit.it 17 points 1 day ago (1 children)

What a horrible day to be working around mig welding machines.

[–] flambonkscious@sh.itjust.works 3 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Aw man, indeed!

I'm in the bathroom on the 8th floor of a hospital building, so I figure it's at least some of the wall? Hourly not the whole building though

[–] altphoto@lemmy.today 3 points 1 day ago

Its just a big ol stuffy, I'll be fine after the surgery.

[–] peoplebeproblems@midwest.social 26 points 1 day ago (3 children)

A couch. Is this like one of JD Vance's fantasies? To be fucked by a couch?

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[–] 9point6@lemmy.world 35 points 2 days ago (4 children)

I just walked past a parked car as I read thatβ€”it's been nice knowing you all

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[–] Dicska@lemmy.world 5 points 1 day ago

Holy mackerel, it's the house!

[–] rockerface@lemm.ee 25 points 2 days ago (2 children)

Toilet paper? All according to plan

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This is rather convenient, as the object to my left is a roll of toilet paper

[–] Fuck_u_spez_@sh.itjust.works 6 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I was leaning against this when I opened the post:

Just be glad it doesn't have needles or thorns.

[–] naun@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago

Large banana stuffie. Could be worse.

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