this post was submitted on 13 May 2025
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Lemmy Shitpost

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Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


Rules:

1. Be Respectful


Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

...


2. No Illegal Content


Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.

That means:

-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals

-No CSA content or Revenge Porn

-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)

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3. No Spam


Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.

-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.

-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.

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-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.

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4. No Porn/ExplicitContent


-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.

-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.

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5. No Enciting Harassment,Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts


-Do not Brigade other Communities

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-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.

-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.

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6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.


-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.

-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.

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If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.


Also check out:

Partnered Communities:

1.Memes

2.Lemmy Review

3.Mildly Infuriating

4.Lemmy Be Wholesome

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6.You Should Know

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9.Ten Forward

10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)


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[–] mrslt@lemmy.world 1 points 1 minute ago

Well, my terrier is going up my ass, apparently. Sorry, boy.

[–] RBWells@lemmy.world 1 points 15 minutes ago

Oh no it's my dog!

[–] thatradomguy@lemmy.world 1 points 24 minutes ago

Air purifier....

[–] bruhbeans@lemmy.ml 2 points 33 minutes ago

A jar. We all know how that ends.

[–] jim3692@discuss.online 2 points 7 hours ago
[–] Thcdenton@lemmy.world 4 points 9 hours ago

A entire bedroom wall

[–] owsei@programming.dev 4 points 10 hours ago

A double width bus chair

Fuck

[–] Disorder6069@sh.itjust.works 1 points 8 hours ago

Floor to ceiling window…

[–] vaultdweller013@sh.itjust.works 3 points 11 hours ago

Its either a large flat screen or CRT that weighs like 70 pounds, I am going to die.

[–] mechoman444@lemmy.world 2 points 11 hours ago

I am currently taking a dump... So the entire bathroom door. 🥲

[–] MajesticElevator@lemmy.zip 2 points 11 hours ago

Computer 👀

[–] LoveSausage@discuss.tchncs.de 2 points 11 hours ago
[–] ftbd@feddit.org 2 points 12 hours ago

4 ft is about 1.2m - a Bo is typically around 1.8m

[–] Chef_Boyardee@lemm.ee 10 points 18 hours ago (1 children)

I'm not putting my cat up my butt, you fucking weirdo.

[–] Dragonstaff@leminal.space 6 points 18 hours ago

You don't do everything a picture on the internet tells you to?

[–] sfled@lemm.ee 7 points 20 hours ago

I now own a Browntooth speaker.

[–] altphoto@lemmy.today 3 points 19 hours ago

Its just a big ol stuffy, I'll be fine after the surgery.

[–] naun@lemmy.world 2 points 19 hours ago

Large banana stuffie. Could be worse.

[–] trslim@pawb.social 71 points 1 day ago (1 children)
[–] kingpepe8006@sh.itjust.works 25 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Well looks like u got the best option

[–] guiguinofake@sh.itjust.works 9 points 1 day ago
[–] Venus_Ziegenfalle@feddit.org 63 points 1 day ago (4 children)
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[–] ThisIsAManWhoKnowsHowToGling@lemmy.dbzer0.com 26 points 1 day ago (4 children)
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[–] Dicska@lemmy.world 5 points 1 day ago

Holy mackerel, it's the house!

[–] brokenlcd@feddit.it 16 points 1 day ago (1 children)

What a horrible day to be working around mig welding machines.

[–] flambonkscious@sh.itjust.works 3 points 20 hours ago* (last edited 20 hours ago)

Aw man, indeed!

I'm in the bathroom on the 8th floor of a hospital building, so I figure it's at least some of the wall? Hourly not the whole building though

[–] GreenKnight23@lemmy.world 5 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

a nice soft blanket. not sure how much will fit but I bet when I take it out it'll feel like taking packing out of your sinuses after an infection.

I can BREATHE!

[–] peoplebeproblems@midwest.social 24 points 1 day ago (3 children)

A couch. Is this like one of JD Vance's fantasies? To be fucked by a couch?

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[–] DaCrazyJamez@sh.itjust.works 7 points 1 day ago

This is rather convenient, as the object to my left is a roll of toilet paper

[–] Zomg@lemmy.world 5 points 1 day ago (1 children)
[–] flambonkscious@sh.itjust.works 4 points 20 hours ago

At least it'll be warm?

[–] Fuck_u_spez_@sh.itjust.works 5 points 1 day ago

I was leaning against this when I opened the post:

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 4 points 1 day ago

I have to shove a whole fucking table up there? 😫

[–] Diddlydee@feddit.uk 7 points 1 day ago (1 children)

It's pointing at my finger, so an easy one.

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It's a car. RIP

[–] 9point6@lemmy.world 31 points 1 day ago (4 children)

I just walked past a parked car as I read that—it's been nice knowing you all

[–] Enkers@sh.itjust.works 6 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Hairbrush. It'd fit fine, but it's got rubberized paint that's coming off the handle. :/

[–] And009@lemmynsfw.com 3 points 17 hours ago

ER has seen worst

[–] Zenith@lemm.ee 5 points 1 day ago

I’m at the DMV, a teenaged girl is sitting next to me 😬

[–] rockerface@lemm.ee 22 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Toilet paper? All according to plan

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[–] M137@lemmy.world 3 points 1 day ago

My bathroom sink... at least my bowels will be empty before it ends up inside me.

[–] Routhinator@startrek.website 13 points 1 day ago

Well.. it's a door. At least my ass will be closed for business after that.

[–] Korhaka@sopuli.xyz 4 points 1 day ago

I am currently regretting my choice to sit in the garden. About 20 concrete blocks.

[–] Gradually_Adjusting@lemmy.world 18 points 1 day ago (1 children)

A 30cm offset serrated bread knife? At least the base is vaguely flared.

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