this post was submitted on 04 Jul 2025
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top 39 comments
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[–] kami@lemmy.dbzer0.com 91 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) (1 children)

Enjoy the benefits of a cordless massager that gives a gentle penetrating massage

They totally knew what they were doing.

[–] danekrae@lemmy.world 68 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) (1 children)

7 inches long. Sturdy high impact plastic.

That's what everybody asks about when buying products for their face.

[–] RandomStickman@fedia.io 25 points 5 days ago (1 children)

eyes, brows, chin, and other parts of the body

[–] Hupf@feddit.org 6 points 5 days ago

Be careful, some might misuse this as a sex toy.

[–] ReCursing@feddit.uk 54 points 5 days ago (7 children)

I have to massage my face due to nerve damage. I bought a massage gun but it is too violent, so I am seriously considering buyijg a cheap sex toy specifically to massage my face!

...but I may be the only one

[–] dickalan@lemmy.world 25 points 5 days ago

Even ones with an adjustable dial are too rough? First off I’m sorry you have nerve damage that sucks second off. I hope the hand dildo works.

[–] hedgehogging_the_bed@lemmy.world 17 points 5 days ago (3 children)

I use an intimate vibrator on my face occasionally to loose up my sinuses. Just give it a good wash before and after; there's nothing wrong with it.

[–] zakobjoa@lemmy.world 8 points 5 days ago

Oh my God that is such a great idea

[–] Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de 6 points 5 days ago

"hey honey can you- what the fuck"

[–] Whelks_chance@lemmy.world 5 points 5 days ago (1 children)
[–] hedgehogging_the_bed@lemmy.world 3 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Not -always- but when things are really goopy and not going anywhere I can vibe for a couple of minutes until it's looser and then blow my nose and get my allergy spray in. It's a nasal spray so I need any room in there to get the meds in. I rub it mostly on my upper cheeks and nose and a little on my forehead.

[–] Whelks_chance@lemmy.world 2 points 4 days ago

Good idea. I may try it myself during allergy season.

[–] cokeslutgarbage@lemmy.world 5 points 4 days ago

I use my vibrator on my neck sometimes when I have a migraine, it works really well.

[–] Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de 8 points 5 days ago (1 children)

what about, like, a regular-ass electric toothbrush?

[–] ReCursing@feddit.uk 3 points 4 days ago

Not a bad call, actually

[–] tpyo@lemmy.world 4 points 4 days ago

I advise not to go "cheap" and make sure you get something body safe. (Cheap toys could be made with harmful materials.) Honestly if you go to a sex shop and explain what the need is, they'll be more than happy to guide you to toys that have the vibrations you need. There's buzzy or rumbly types and come in a huge range of strengths and textures

Seriously, they'd be ecstatic to help! And you would absolutely not be the only one

Unsolicited recommendation?:
I'm not sure what you need specifically, but something like this might work? https://lovecrave.com/products/vesper It's small and you can use the tip for pinpoint or the length of it for a larger area. It is rumbly, surprisingly so for such a small device, and has different strengths (and patterns), and doesn't look like a sex toy

[–] Rai@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Get a We-Vibe Touch! It’s got a silicone exterior and it goes from little vibrations to fairly strong.

[–] hedgehogging_the_bed@lemmy.world 2 points 4 days ago (1 children)

That's super pricey for this. Any $15 vibe from Amazon will do.

[–] Rai@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 4 days ago (1 children)

That’s fair. I have one for other things and I love it very much.

[–] hedgehogging_the_bed@lemmy.world 2 points 4 days ago (1 children)

I have a WeVibe Tango and have loved it for a very long time.

[–] Rai@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 4 days ago

I have a tango as well! They’re excellent toys!

[–] loomy@lemy.lol 3 points 5 days ago (1 children)
[–] ReCursing@feddit.uk 1 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Perhaps the most American statement...

But no, the massage gun was definitely too violent for what I need for my face

[–] loomy@lemy.lol 2 points 4 days ago

it's for the head

[–] KingPorkChop@lemmy.ca 37 points 5 days ago (2 children)

I gave one of these to my girlfriend the day before I had to go away on business for 2 months.

She said "What is this for?"

I said "It's a replacement for my you-know-what."

She said "Oh, ok. I think I get it."

I got home 2 months later and she had 3 chipped teeth.

[–] ColeSloth@discuss.tchncs.de 25 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Yeah, but when I was a kid back in the 80's and saw them in the mail order catalogs, I completely believed they were just head and neck massagers.

[–] surewhynotlem@lemmy.world 21 points 5 days ago

They can be. Just keep a good grip on the base. You don't want to choke.

[–] Kaput@lemmy.world 29 points 5 days ago

I almost bought one as a Christmas present for my mom when I was ten. The last in the catalogue was holding it to her shoulder... I'm so glad I picked the brass penguin instead.

[–] Walk_blesseD@piefed.blahaj.zone 10 points 5 days ago (2 children)

What's the bet that the "sturdy high impact plastic" isn't body safe?

[–] tpyo@lemmy.world 6 points 4 days ago

Is there a percentage higher than 100?

[–] BreadOven@lemmy.world 5 points 4 days ago

It doesn't release microplastics, it releases macroplastics.

[–] FartsWithAnAccent@fedia.io 12 points 5 days ago

massage in cream

You don't say...

[–] PTSDwarrior@lemmy.ml 10 points 5 days ago

Reminds me of the Adult Swim ad for salad tossers that looked suspiciously like…a tool that really gives women pleasure. And here it is: Salad Mixxxer

[–] EndlessNightmare@reddthat.com 8 points 5 days ago

Careful though, it doesn't have a flared base.

[–] FelixCress@lemmy.world 10 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) (1 children)

I am pretty sure some did, after.

[–] mastod0n@lemmy.world 6 points 5 days ago

It never was intended as a "face massager".