this post was submitted on 16 Sep 2025
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Not The Onion

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[–] Kinperor@lemmy.ca 13 points 19 hours ago

"I'm very concerned about my surgery, is the surgeon very talented?"

"Oh, he fucks"

"You mean that figuratively? As in, he's very good at what he does?"

"..."

[–] rumba@lemmy.zip 7 points 19 hours ago
[–] Bennyboybumberchums@lemmy.world 4 points 17 hours ago

Man, that show really went to shit...

[–] FuckFascism@lemmy.world 20 points 1 day ago (2 children)

If a retail worker did that shit they'd get fired on the spot. What a shit show smfh.

[–] MajorasTerribleFate@lemmy.zip 11 points 18 hours ago (1 children)

Pretty sure if a retail worker was caught performing surgery, they'd be arrested.

[–] FuckFascism@lemmy.world 2 points 17 hours ago

Harharhar you're so funny I'm belly laughing right now.

[–] svcg@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 17 hours ago* (last edited 17 hours ago) (1 children)

Much harder to replace a trained anaesthetist than a retail worker, though.

[–] FuckFascism@lemmy.world 3 points 17 hours ago

Not a good excuse

[–] Mr_Dr_Oink@lemmy.world 36 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Look he's been travelling through time and space for thousands of years and spent billions of years dying repeatedly in a time loop, i don't think he gives a shit about some patient in surgery when there's a chance to get his end away.

[–] SlartyBartFast@sh.itjust.works 10 points 1 day ago (2 children)

He will tap 'dat four times

[–] Mr_Dr_Oink@lemmy.world 3 points 1 day ago

A masterful joke.

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[–] HugeNerd@lemmy.ca 5 points 1 day ago

Specially if he gets to tap peak Billie Piper or Freema Agyeman.

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 19 points 1 day ago (1 children)

the everfucking fuck, he's an anaesthetist. anyone else in the OR can skip out for 15 seconds to fuck, he can't.

[–] qarbone@lemmy.world 4 points 19 hours ago (1 children)
[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 6 points 19 hours ago

oh look at johnny 20 seconds here

[–] Adderbox76@lemmy.ca 23 points 1 day ago (2 children)
[–] BowtiesAreCool@lemmy.world 1 points 9 hours ago

I really which they would change these headlines. “Doctor that-“ is perfectly acceptable and doesn’t make me think about Doctor who lol. I see them regularly

[–] SkaveRat@discuss.tchncs.de 10 points 1 day ago

it gets bigger on the inside.

Timelords are canines, confirmed

[–] RymrgandsDaughter@lemmy.world 16 points 1 day ago (1 children)

honestly I don't even care, at least the doctor wasn't fucking the patient

[–] echodot@feddit.uk 3 points 1 day ago

That would have been better. The problem seems to have been leaving the operating room.

[–] mavu@discuss.tchncs.de 43 points 1 day ago (2 children)

LIES! Doctor Who would never leave a patient like that!

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[–] quick_snail@feddit.nl 38 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Why did they put a time lord into the operations room, anyway?

[–] YiddishMcSquidish@lemmy.today 1 points 16 hours ago

Who is this doctor anyways‽

[–] ABetterTomorrow@sh.itjust.works 63 points 2 days ago (4 children)

Doctor Who is getting nuts these days.

[–] brax@sh.itjust.works 2 points 17 hours ago

Per the headline, it seems he's giving nuts more than getting nuts. But maybe both?

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[–] CaptainBlinky@lemmy.myserv.one 112 points 2 days ago (18 children)

Bullshit. Doctor Who would never leave a patient during an operation to have sex. I'm not sure The Doctor ever has sex. Well maybe Tenant's clone but he wasn't really The Doctor at that point was he?

[–] JcbAzPx@lemmy.world 1 points 18 hours ago (1 children)

The very first Doctor had a granddaughter. So canonically he had to have had sex at least once.

[–] CaptainBlinky@lemmy.myserv.one 1 points 12 hours ago

Yeah, my comment about him possibly never having sex aged like milk. But he definitely wouldn't stop saving someone to do it!

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[–] Olhonestjim@lemmy.world 35 points 2 days ago (2 children)

A whole lot of you seem to prefer your narcissistic surgeon to operate on you while horny out of his mind. If he's got a boner to the point he can't concentrate, and I can be kept stable a few minutes, and he has a willing partner, be my guest.

[–] aramis87@fedia.io 47 points 2 days ago (3 children)

It was an anesthesiologist. And yeah, I'd much rather be kept sleep throughout the entire surgery, thanks.

[–] frezik@lemmy.blahaj.zone 47 points 2 days ago (4 children)

So that it's clear to everyone, anesthesiologists are usually the highest paid person on any surgical team, and there's a reason for that. Knocking you out without killing you is hard.

That said, the guy did leave someone else to monitor things, and wasn't gone for much more than a long bathroom break.

[–] Coopr8@kbin.earth 19 points 1 day ago

Open secret of the surgery business is that the CRNAs (specialty anesthesia nurses) do all the actual anesthesia work, the Anesthesiologist's job is really to pick the anesthetic based on patient history and bloodwork, do the calculations for dosing based on body weight, and attend for interventions if something goes wrong. The Nurse he put in charge when he left was almost certainly already doing all the work anyway and he was just twiddling his thumbs with a hard on in the corner.

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However, she was satisfied

Phrasing.

...that Anjum was determined not to repeat his past misconduct and considered the risk of repetition to be “very low”.

That old medical adage: Fuck me once, shame on you. Fuck me twice... You can't get fucked again.

[–] TropicalDingdong@lemmy.world 68 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Was the operation a success?

[–] Endmaker@ani.social 86 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (6 children)

Anjum was absent from the operating room for eight minutes and the patient came to no harm.

That poor nurse... With the removal of gloves, coats and other items, followed by the replacement of them, that leaves little time for her. This dudes a two pump chump.

[–] Carighan@piefed.world 36 points 2 days ago (1 children)

8 minutes? Disappointing. Hope the nurse found someone better.

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[–] psycho_driver@lemmy.world 16 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Was operation successful? Whatever it takes, man.

[–] viking@infosec.pub 5 points 1 day ago

Article says the patient was under general anesthesia and being monitored by the assistant anesthesiologist, the doctor was the main anesthesiologist, not the surgeon. So there wasn't really any risk.

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