this post was submitted on 26 Oct 2023
810 points (98.7% liked)

Microblog Memes

7475 readers
2232 users here now

A place to share screenshots of Microblog posts, whether from Mastodon, tumblr, ~~Twitter~~ X, KBin, Threads or elsewhere.

Created as an evolution of White People Twitter and other tweet-capture subreddits.

Rules:

  1. Please put at least one word relevant to the post in the post title.
  2. Be nice.
  3. No advertising, brand promotion or guerilla marketing.
  4. Posters are encouraged to link to the toot or tweet etc in the description of posts.

Related communities:

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 63 points 2 years ago (7 children)

Eat them because mangoes are delicious.

[–] CannedTuna@sh.itjust.works 11 points 2 years ago (2 children)
[–] deus@lemmy.world 20 points 2 years ago (1 children)

When life gives you mangos, don’t make mangonade. Make life take the mangos back! Get mad! I don’t want your damn mangos, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life’s manager!

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] LesMotsBalaises@lemmy.ca 5 points 2 years ago (1 children)

When life gives you mangoes, make mangonade.

[–] Klear@sh.itjust.works 3 points 2 years ago (3 children)

What if life gives you shit?

[–] flerp@lemm.ee 6 points 2 years ago

invest in bidets

[–] kratoz29@lemm.ee 6 points 2 years ago

Do shit posting.

[–] LesMotsBalaises@lemmy.ca 5 points 2 years ago

Start a shitake mushroom culture.

Get started here

[–] IWantToFuckSpez@kbin.social 4 points 2 years ago

I like manstays more.

load more comments (5 replies)
[–] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 50 points 2 years ago
[–] bionicjoey@lemmy.ca 26 points 2 years ago (2 children)

This reminds me of the one Christmas where both my parents got the other an expensive new coffee machine. I knew. I was the only one of their kids who knew. I said nothing. It was really funny watching them open on Christmas day.

[–] schmidtster@lemmy.world 12 points 2 years ago

Good thing they could easily return one of them.

[–] JackGreenEarth@lemm.ee 6 points 2 years ago (1 children)
[–] dadGPT@lemmy.world 24 points 2 years ago (1 children)

yes but only on the outside

[–] bionicjoey@lemmy.ca 12 points 2 years ago

Wow! dadGPT responded exactly how my dad would have!

[–] lepthesr@lemmy.world 16 points 2 years ago (2 children)

OP, you missed a quality joke by asking what to do with 23 mangoes.

[–] oce@jlai.lu 4 points 2 years ago

I'll take the mango number five.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] Sterile_Technique@lemmy.world 15 points 2 years ago (2 children)
[–] fsxylo@sh.itjust.works 11 points 2 years ago (1 children)

That's right. Time for fractions!

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] doingthestuff@lemmy.world 12 points 2 years ago (3 children)

This is where you add layers to the problem by giving away mangoes. You give Alice two more mangoes than you give Gunther, and the dog steals one but you still have twelve mangoes. How many mangoes did Gunther get?

[–] Deconceptualist@lemm.ee 11 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (1 children)

Five.

Started with 25, still have 12, need to account for 13.

Dog took one, so that's 12.

If Alice and Gunther got the same number it would be 6 each.

But she got 2 more than him, which is just a +1/-1 adjustment.

So Alice got 7 and Gunther got 5.

[–] SnipingNinja@slrpnk.net 4 points 2 years ago

They did the math

[–] Agent641@lemmy.world 6 points 2 years ago

Did the dog steal from me, Alice, or Gunther?

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] Varyk@sh.itjust.works 11 points 2 years ago (7 children)

Slice em up, dry em over a fan, dried mango slices are the beeeest snaaaack

[–] grue@lemmy.world 13 points 2 years ago

Boil 'em, mash 'em, stick 'em in a stew!

[–] Rolando@lemmy.world 7 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Or chop em up and put them in the fridge.

[–] Varyk@sh.itjust.works 4 points 2 years ago (3 children)
load more comments (3 replies)
[–] surewhynotlem@lemmy.world 7 points 2 years ago (2 children)

And expensive. At least at the rate I go through them.

[–] kratoz29@lemm.ee 7 points 2 years ago

Huh, are they? Should I feel fortunate that my family has a mango tree?

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (4 replies)
[–] swnt@feddit.de 11 points 2 years ago (3 children)

Who writes mangoes instead of simply mangos?

I never knew some people write it differently

[–] Chariotwheel@kbin.social 31 points 2 years ago

mangoes where he pleases

[–] radix@lemm.ee 9 points 2 years ago (3 children)

I accept "mangoes" because of the English rule that nouns that end in a consonant followed by a vowel should be padded with another vowel ("e") before the "-s". Another example I can think of off the top of my head is "heroes", not "heros".

However, I also accept "mangos" because it feels right. Wiktionary says "mango" is Portuguese, and I don't know Portuguese, but at least in Spanish you don't pluralize with "-es", just "-s".

load more comments (3 replies)
[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 7 points 2 years ago (1 children)

I do. Wanna fight about it?

[–] swnt@feddit.de 7 points 2 years ago (1 children)

As a man, I went away already. Sorry.

[–] lugal@lemmy.ml 4 points 2 years ago

I see, he gos away...

[–] ivanafterall@kbin.social 10 points 2 years ago (2 children)

Wait, so...what time is the train leaving New York City? We can figure this out!

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] secondaccountlemmy@lemmy.world 8 points 2 years ago

Ya'll clearly havent had mango graham fridge cakes. Simple to make and freaking delicious.

[–] toomanypancakes@lemmy.world 8 points 2 years ago

Pickle em, naturally

[–] roo@lemmy.one 7 points 2 years ago (1 children)

You know how to solve this son!

Son: eats everything, no problem!

[–] match@pawb.social 6 points 2 years ago

Son: eats 1/5th of mangoes and brings 1/5th of the remaining amount to school

Friend: eats half of the amount son brings to school

[–] MargotRobbie@lemmy.world 6 points 2 years ago (1 children)

You can turn these mangos into man-gones pretty quickly if you eat them on their own or with some Tajin seasoning; alternatively, you can't have too much mango habenero sauce around the house. (I will admit that it is too spicy for me sometimes).

[–] SnipingNinja@slrpnk.net 5 points 2 years ago

There's also mango milkshake, which is amazing and will use up a lot of mangoes, same with mango lassi/smoothie, and mango cheesecake is underrated.

I'm sure I can think of recipes for that amount of mangoes, living in a place where mangoes are very common in the summer and eaten a lot, it's just not a big amount.

You can also make mango parfait or salad.

[–] TheBat@lemmy.world 5 points 2 years ago
[–] scottyjoe9@sh.itjust.works 4 points 2 years ago (1 children)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] FleetingTit@feddit.de 4 points 2 years ago

Wait until they are fully ripe and then freeze them for smoothies!

[–] TheLonelyWonderer@lemmy.world 4 points 2 years ago

Find a recipe for dim sum restaurant style mango pudding.

Or Thai mango sticky rice.

Or just dice them up and use them as topping for yogurts and ice cream. Ripe mangoes are delicious.

load more comments
view more: next ›