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And that’s basically it!
Federal police are still investigating whether the aircraft was involved in drug trafficking
Um....
finally an article that's oniony beyond the headline
Maybe it was just for personal use
Musk's personal stash
It was headed to a Coca-Cola factory. They are adding it back along with real cane sugar.
I remember when a business jet packed to the gills with cocaine crashed and when they investigated, it turned out to be owned by a CIA shell company and previously used to shuttle people to Guantanamo for torture after an extraordinary rendition
I thought no fucking way they found over 7000lb of cocaine on a little business jet but yeah, that Gulfstream could probably barely take off with that much on board. That's one badass airframe.
Maximum payload is 1.5t but the fuel payload is 12t so 3t of cocaine barely scratches it
!bitchimaplane
Hi aplane, I'm dad.
Oh my god still? Cocaine isn't cool anymore. Fent is more profitable to move. What the hell? Was The Deserter right?
Well there goes Elon's Doordash. Definitely not getting that $10 tip now.
This is ridiculous.
Elon never tips.
Not entirely true, he'll tip if you carry his baby to term. Sometimes he'll even tip in horses.
Guess Elon's weekly shipment will be late. Probably scrambling to replace it off the streets like some kind of nose-mounted vacuum cleaner.
oh no, Elon's weekly supply!!
Wow! I wonder what will happen to those 178kgs of cocaine they found!
It wouldn't even surprise me if some of the 150kg of cocaine went missing.
Someone really ought to take care of the 120 kg of cocaine.
80 kilos of cocaine is quite a lot, it really should be disposed of safely.
good thing 40 kilos is exactly what fits in the evidence room
I wonder if it's a joke label or not
Some drug traffickers use existing brands to "market" themselves.
Here's some Afghan heroin seized and destroyed by the international coalition on the Arabian Sea in 2021:
Any other company and I'd probably go yeah, the dealers did that, but I wholeheartedly believe Tesla has a cocaine manufacturing department.
I only get that Johnny Chimpo branded stuff. It's Afghanistanimation!
It's real. I used to buy Nike brand ecstasy all the time.
If you have a Nike store in your town, I recommend you go in and ask for the triple stacks.
I'm sorry?
How do they know it's a fake spaceX packaging? Seems legit to me.
That’s this cursed timeline’s equivalent of Mitsubishi MDMA pills
Fuck yeah my guy! You brought back memories...
It can be one of three scenarios IMO:
A: Elon is being particularly dumb and actually produced and distributed drugs with his logo.
B: The Trump Regime created and planted these drugs to manufacture a reason to prosecute Elon.
C: Some drug distributor is a huge fan of SpaceX, or wants to deflect investigation away from their other operations.
...the world being the way it is, all three seems pretty damn plausible to me. 😕
D: They're branding their coke the same way that MDMA pill pressers will stamp real logos on their product to market it (without permission, of course). They usually don't do this with coke, but it's not unheard of.
definitely c. you ever seen shitty weed packaging thats an obvious reference to Rick and Morty, trump, etc? looks like that culture has made its way to cocaine now
in other news: are mitsubishi and tesla involved in global ecstasy sales?
I personally have a theory that they are indeed supplying pill manufacturers with high quality presses.
Most high quality pills (not talking about contents) I have seen beeing confiscated in night clubs are branded with car or fashion brands.
So maybe they are targeting people when they have a high happy hormone output.
Like: woah that mitsubishi is making me feel soooo great and suff.
Oh god the new Tesla's are so strong.
Sounds like something marketing departments would get off on.
Plane full of drugs crashes. Police are still investigating if it was involved in drug trafficking... what?
I thought I was clicking through to a satire site. Da fuq is this.
SpaceX W H A T
MDMA pills are often branded with various logos from all sorts of companies and IPs (without permission, of course), so I imagine it was something similar to that.
How much of the product was in the pilot's system?