Sleep on her side of the bed. Then don’t tell her what you did.
This is some next-level chaos.
She'll know. The smell. Also the breadcrumbs.
And bits of dried pizza cheese.
When my partner is out of town, I put porn on the big screen
When my partner is out of town that's the one time I splurge for an actual porn subscription
Don't change your underwear for two days.
Already on it.
I'm proud of you.
Factorio
He said he only had a weekend though.
Do what I do, plan for porn, fastfood and beer. In reality you buy a six pack of your old brand, then drink half a beer with a large cheeseburger. Get queasy from the burger and fall a sleep before you manage to play with yourself. Wake up to find that the dog ate your fries and got diarrhea, which you slept through on account of the beer. Now clean up dog diarrhea with hangovers while swearing that you'll never drink half a beer.
LPT: disable the roomba before sitting down, and make sure that the dog has been walked...
"Alcohol and weed don't sound appealing."
We are not the same meme
Try a tab of lsd and go for a nice walk in the woods
Just to add to this. Take a nice shower, eat something light, wear comfy cloths, and take your trip. Stay safe, enjoy, and have bottle of water with you :)
Ugh. I hate it when people have a far easier time than I do finding drugs. Every dealer assumes I’m a cop
Ooh, study for 14 hours straight and forget to eat! That's usually what I do. Wild times.
If you don’t like alcohol or weed, cocaine is a helluva drug.
Heh yeah. I'll just call up my xoke dealer.
Edit:
bout to get wild
Aww yeah, gonna get the iron warmed up for an all nighter
Pee in all the sinks.
What about the sink I poop in?
The shower.
Waffle stomp!
Cleaning that up is gonna be work.
I watch horribly artsy movies or put speed runs on the big TV, blast music aloud, I order a pizza, and I consume the substances you don't find appealing, and I wear the same clothes the entire time without changing
Cocaine feels like a good time.
Cocaine feels like the need for more cocaine.
No one has ever been more correct.
A strong few years of devoted, in-depth field research on the subject yielded this insight and…not much else. Still trying to get published, maybe in High Times Investigative Quarterly (they’re an academic outfit, right?)
You guys are amazing
grind leetcode
Rearrange the lounge, or if you want to play it safe, maybe just the shed
Have you thought of lipstick and nail polish?
Buy one of those silicone eggs to jerk off with
Truest statement.
hookers?
Asklemmy
A loosely moderated place to ask open-ended questions
If your post meets the following criteria, it's welcome here!
- Open-ended question
- Not offensive: at this point, we do not have the bandwidth to moderate overtly political discussions. Assume best intent and be excellent to each other.
- Not regarding using or support for Lemmy: context, see the list of support communities and tools for finding communities below
- Not ad nauseam inducing: please make sure it is a question that would be new to most members
- An actual topic of discussion
Looking for support?
Looking for a community?
- Lemmyverse: community search
- sub.rehab: maps old subreddits to fediverse options, marks official as such
- !lemmy411@lemmy.ca: a community for finding communities
~Icon~ ~by~ ~@Double_A@discuss.tchncs.de~